Alpha - Chapter 5

While Seven and Kathryn were still technically on their vacation from Starfleet duties, many people at Starfleet Command were eager to see them when they returned from their holiday to Cairns. Dutifully Kathryn and Seven agreed to take two days off their holiday to attend several meetings. Key members of Starfleet and the Federation had been contacted concerning the technology used to get Voyager home, and the person behind it.

One of Kathryn's first tasks was to appear on Earth Comm 1's morning news service. Starfleet wanted to milk Voyager's return for all it was worth. The more positive information in the wider community the better. The live lost, and resources used in the recent war against the Dominion had done much to deplete moral levels on Earth and all over the Alpha Quadrant. Many news services had run with Voyager's triumphant return, and they were eager to interview Captain Janeway, as the legend of this woman was spreading far and wide.

The official Starfleet line on their return was a wormhole. Not a stable wormhole like the Bajoran one near Deep Space Nine, but a randomly appearing wormhole, open just long enough to get them home. Captain Janeway felt uneasy as she was briefed on this. However she didn't have a great deal of choice in the matter.

The other thing waiting for the couple was the U.S.S. Enterprise. Commonly regarded as the flagship of the fleet, the Enterprise legacy now had some competition from the amazing odyssey of Voyager. Some second hand accounts of their travels had already reached Janeway's ears and she wondered how these preposterous tales had been started. The name Tom Paris came to mind...

Janeway knew there was some deeper reason behind the Enterprise's appearance. Captain Jean-Luc Picard's reputation proceeded him. Janeway had never met her fellow Captain, but wasn't surprised when he requested a meeting with her and Seven. Janeway suspected he was far more interested in meeting Seven than herself. Picard's history with the Borg had been well-documented in Starfleet records.

Seven and Kathryn arrived at Starfleet Command in time to have lunch in the Officers Dining room before their meeting. It didn't seem to matter where they went in the facility, Seven's presence continued to turn heads. Curious glances were thrown in their direction and Janeway did her best to ignore them, especially the ones on familiar faces. She and Seven took a table as far as they could away from the other dinners. They sat down and remained silent, each aware that most of the people in the room were still looking in their direction, and most were obviously talking about them.

A man stood up He tugged at the jacket of his uniform as he walked towards them. Seven noticed him first. Her face lost all colour, she stood up as he reached the table.

"Locutus"

Picard stood there and looked deep into her blue eyes. Janeway could not gauge what was going through his mind. Janeway knew this man harboured deep scars from his assimilation by the Borg. She had read the files when she severed Seven's link.

"I am Seven of Nine, Tertiary Adjunct to Unimatrix 01."

"Jean-Luc Picard" he extended his hand to Seven. Then he turned to Janeway. "Captain, Seven, it is a pleasure to meet you both." His voice had a gentle timbre that indicated sincerity.

The rest of the room seemed to go back to the issue at hand, eating lunch.

"I saw Voyager when we came into orbit. You took magnificent care of her, Captain."

Janeway nodded. "Thank you." He knew how to get on her good side. Takes a captain to know a captain.

"I'll be meeting with you both at fourteen hundred hours. I look forward to talking further then."

Picard walked back to his table, Seven kept her gaze fixed on him.

"Do you remember him?" asked Kathryn.

She turned her focus back to Janeway.

"Of course. I share his memories. His presence was strong. I was at Wolf 359?as you know." She looked down at the table.

"Yes I did. How come we've never discussed it?"

"I did not think you wanted to."

"Seven, you're time with the Borg doesn't bother me. We can discuss it."

"I assimilated many people, including many of your fellow officers. Wolf 359 was not the only time I encountered the Federation."

Kathryn paused for a moment, glancing around at the room filled with Starfleet uniforms. Suddenly Seven seemed very alone here, very vulnerable in this home of the Federation. It didn't seem right for a place that was supposed to be about diversity. "Seven, I've had to take lives in battle before. It's not something I'm particularly proud of either." She paused again, trying to articulate what she was feeling. "Seven, you were part of a hive mind. You were not able to make your own individual decision to take someone's life. The burden of responsibility does not lie with you, it is not your burden to bear."

Seven sighed. "Very well."

The couple ate the rest of their lunch in relative silence. It was times like these that Kathryn realised how much she did not allow herself to think about Seven's past. It did not frighten her, or even bother her to a large extent and knowing this it was surprising that she chose to bury this fact deep inside herself.

On their way to the meeting room, Seven became slightly nervous. She was interested to meet another who had survived assimilation, but she knew her own experiences were remarkably different to Picard's. One cannot compare days to over 18 years with the Borg. There had been no one who could truly understand what her life had been like, and there was a fear of someone being able to see her down to her core.

As they reached to door, Seven halted momentarily. "Thank you for understanding, Kathryn."

Janeway understood what her lover was trying to say. She smiled at the beautiful woman before her, and was flooded with a sense of pride for the person Seven had become. Even in those early days they had fit somehow. Two halves of a whole.

They entered the room and looked at the faces of the group gathered. Seven recognized Admiral Harris and Captain Picard, but the rest were unknown to her. It was to be an informal meeting, so the Admiral ushered Janeway and Seven over to the group.

"I know you both took time off from your holiday. I can't tell you how much we appreciate it," Harris stated. "Captain Picard you already know. This is Counselor Deanna Troi and Dr. Beverly Crusher."

Seven nodded to the officers. She was displeased there was yet another counsellor among the crew, and hoped she would not be subjected to another session. They all took a seat at the conference table.

Picard folded his hands on the table surface. "As you aware, there are some parties within Starfleet who are concerned with your history as a Borg drone." Picard leveled his gaze at Seven. "And Starfleet has handled those concerns badly. Because of my background with the Borg, Starfleet feels that I'm the most qualified to put those concerns to rest. Counselor Troi-"

"I have no desire to talk to any more counselors," Seven stated coolly.

Troi was unscathed by the comment. "I treated Captain Picard after his assimilation. I understand that you have had a bad experience with Starfleet counselors since your arrival."

"I found their manner tedious and questions irrelevant," said Seven coolly.

Everyone in the room privately smirked at this comment, particularly Picard.

"Understandable, but they were inefficient. I am not." Deanna had empathically picked up on what Seven wanted to hear, and stated it with Borg-like efficiency.

"And Dr. Crusher has more experience in removing Borg implants than any doctor in Starfleet, save perhaps Voyager's Doctor. She has some ideas concerning cutting down your required regeneration time. We are here to assist you Seven, not to interrogate."

Seven threw a glance over at Janeway, who gave her a little nod. The interaction was not lost on the observers.

"I understand."

"Would you like Bev-Dr. Crusher to look at your implants?"

Seven let out the breath she had been holding. "That is acceptable."

"Alright, that's a good start," Admiral Harris smiled. "Seven, regarding Gateway. How long until we'll be able to use it?"

"Admiral it may take several months of analyzing current data, then more testing before we try again. To be perfectly honest, I have thought very little about the project since our return. However, when Kathryn and I finish our vacation I believe I will be recruiting staff, and commencing work. Is that still correct, Admiral?"

"Yes, Seven."

Kathryn was a little less than pleased that Seven had used her first name with these officers. It felt slightly unprofessional.

The room became quiet for a second, and everyone seemed to wonder why no one had bought up the obvious reason this meeting had been called. In her usual manner, Seven decided it was time to break the ice.

"The main priority is the Gateway development, not my time with the Borg, correct?"

"Absolutely. We just want you to feel comfortable with working with us, and vice versa, that's all."

"Then I suggest, since I am missing vacation time, that is what we should discuss."

They spent the afternoon discussing Starfleet's development plans for Gateway, and the Enterprise's role in them. Being the flagship, Starfleet wanted them to be the first fitted with the technology.

As the meeting ended Picard felt some element of success. Not only had he managed to get Seven to agree to see Beverly for an exam but she also agreed to a later appointment with Troi, who was now jabbing him rather painfully in the ribs with her elbow.

"Maybe you should ask them to dinner so you can talk in a more non-threatening environment."

"Both of them?" he said, looking over at the couple, who were preparing to leave saying their good-byes to Harris.

Both women nodded, smiling.

Sometimes he hated being the only man in the group. There always seemed to be some great cosmic joke he was missing.

"Very well." He stood and crossed the room. He had to fight the urge to address Seven in a completely Borg-like fashion. Seven functioned in a strange area between human and Borg.

"Seven, Captain," he nodded. "I was wondering if it would be convenient to meet later for dinner, I'd like to hear about your time in the Delta quadrant."

"And my time as a Borg", Seven added helpfully.

"And that, yes."

"That would be acceptable. Kathryn and I have no other plans."

Again with the 'Kathryn". Seven was obviously enjoying her non-Starfleet status.

"Do you have anywhere in mind?" Janeway asked.

"Not particularly."

"Great, I know just the place."

When Picard was finally alone with his two officers he looked over at them imploringly.

"Would you care to explain what's so funny? And why you ordered me to invite them out to dinner?"

They began a mutual snicker.

"Don't worry, Beverly, I'll handle this." Deanna got up from her seat, and took him delicately by the arm.

"Sometimes, when two people love each other very much-"

Kathryn had deliberately chosen e'Cucina for three reasons; one, she had been dying to go there since her return, secondly it was right near their house and lastly it was not a regular Starfleet hang out.

Picard had contacted them earlier to inform that that Dr Beverly Crusher would also be joining them for dinner. Kathryn was immediately sensed that the two were a couple. She was glad to not be the only Captain in Starfleet to have a relationship with a crewmember.

Picard stood as Seven and Kathryn approached the table, "I'm so glad you could both join us."

"Thank you for asking us, Captain Picard." replied Seven.

"Please, tonight we can dispense with the formalities."

"Of course." replied Kathryn.

Both Beverly and Picard were still in uniform, however Seven and Kathryn were in more casual attire.

"That is a lovely dress Kathryn," said Beverly.

Janeway looked momentarily embarrassed that she was not in uniform. "Thank you... technically we're still on holiday, hence the attire..."

"Oh please, I would be too if we weren't held up at Starfleet Command, we ended up coming straight here."

"Yes, well having worn the uniform almost everyday for eight years left little to be desired... I was quite glad to see that it had been changed in our absence. A little variety will be much appreciated."

Beverly knew exactly what Kathryn was talking about, and was visibly appalled at the thought of wearing the uniform for that long.

The group indulged in small talk, and ordered their meals. Neither Picard nor Seven felt it was the right time to discuss their respective Borg experiences, and were having fun discussing a wide range of topics instead.

"I have an appointment with you tomorrow, Seven" Beverly commented to Seven, who seemed to almost flinch at the statement. "There really is nothing to worry about, it's just a preliminary evaluation. You seem to have recovered physically from your time with the Borg."

"Her body began rejecting her implants en masse?we had no choice but to remove them quickly. But yes, she recovered remarkably well," Janeway stated.

Seven shot her a sideways glance that said maybe Janeway should let her answer her own questions. "Thank you."

Janeway just gave a little shrug.

"I'm looking forward to examining the research you did in the Delta quadrant. The time you spent there must have been?extraordinary," Picard commented.

"That's a good way of putting it. It was an adventure, but I must admit?it's nice not to have to look over my shoulder for once."

"Nevertheless, it's a good skill to have around the Federation these days," he said.

Seven raised an implant-shrouded eyebrow, Janeway merely nodded and took a sip of her drink.

Kathryn and Seven spoke about their recent holiday to Port Douglas, and the homecoming they had had with family and friends. As the night wore on both women talked openly about their relationship. Beverly was particularly interested in how they handled it on board Voyager. As Kathryn spoke Beverly found herself wishing that she and Jean-Luc had experienced such an extraordinary event, such as getting lost so far away from Starfleet and home. Their own relationship may have started a lot earlier.

As the night wore on Kathryn found she had much in common with Dr. Crusher. Likewise Seven and Jean-Luc were obviously connected on many levels. It was a particularly fun evening for Seven, as she did not feel like an outsider in this setting. While she was knew Kathryn's friends would come to be accept her, she had felt a bit left out of it during her first meeting with them.

As they parted company for the evening Seven seemed to be looking forward to spending the following day at Starfleet Command with Picard, even if she did have to see Counselor Troi for a short while. She now understood more about this woman's role in Picard's recovery, and was not so weary of her.

The following day Kathryn hesitated as she said goodbye to Seven when they arrived at Starfleet Command. She knew the time with Picard might help Seven, however Kathryn suspected it would be more cathartic for Picard to put a human face on his greatest fear, than it would be for Seven to bond with another survivor of the Borg.

Kathryn made her way to meet with Starfleet personal; she was required to give recommendations on the placements of the Voyager crew. Many had requested positions that were close to their families, some were resigning their commissions all together. After eight years, it seemed no one was in a hurry to get back on another Starship. Even Kathryn would be happy to leave it many years before taking command of another ship.

There were a few surprises waiting for Kathryn. Tuvok and Chakotay were there to meet her, both had their resignations in hand. Tuvok was heading home to take a position as a spiritual master. Chakotay was going to remain on Earth for the moment, he was going back to the remaining members of his tribe. Many of his people were killed in the Dominion war, and those who had a chance came back to the land on Earth that was rightfully theirs.

Kathryn spoke at length with Tuvok, and promised to visit in six months time. However she spent a great deal of time trying to persuade Chakotay to simply take a one-year leave of absence, and not to officially resign. However no argument she used was able to dissuade him. His mind was made up. The one consolation was the fact that he would be on Earth. The pair had enjoyed a great professional relationship, and while she knew that Chakotay had wanted more for a long time, Kathryn was unable to return the feelings. In the early days of her relationship with Seven, Chakotay was the last to realise there was something going on between the pair. His blindness was testament to his true feelings for Kathryn, and he harboured a strong resentment towards Seven that lasted for a fairly long time. In recent months he had been a wonderful friend to Kathryn, and even Seven, as had so many people on Voyager, and she knew they would always remain close.

Seven of Nine spent the morning with Counsellor Deanna Troi. She reported to counselor's office which was filled with furniture in which the only way to sit was to slouch.

Kathryn would feel right at home here, she thought with a smirk.

"So, Seven, Captain Picard will be here in a while, I wanted a chance to get to know you first." Deanna sat down in a plush chair across from her.

"Why don't you tell me a little about yourself."

"Very well," she said, attempting to straighten herself a little in the chair. "I was assimilated by the Borg at the age of six years old. I was then put into a maturation chamber, where I remained until-"

"Okay, just a second," she said holding up a hand. "That's good?a good start, but I can read that information in your file, which I've already done. Let's talk about who you are right now, okay?"

"Very well. What would you like to know?"

"I sense a lot of unease in you. What is it about speaking to a counselor that bothers you so much? Aside from your earlier experiences with Starfleet counselors."

"I am?not proficient in expressing emotions."

"Okay, that's good for me to know. I want to go right to the hard questions, okay? Can you still hear the voices of the collective, the ones that are stored inside you?"

"If I want to."

"Has that ever caused any problems?"

"Only once, when a virus from a Borg viniculum infected me."

After she told the story, Picard arrived. They both discussed the experience of being linked to the hive mind. After a few hours Picard suggested they head down to Golden Gate Park for the afternoon. All the talk of the Borg made him want to get a closer to nature for a while. Seven saw the horses available for a ride; she had only ridden a horse once before on the holodeck with Kathryn. When Picard heard this, he insisted they have a go at the real thing.

Both horses entered a gentle gait as they rode through the park. The leaves were already beginning to turn, many littered the ground, giving the air a musty aroma. Sunlight filtered through the trees, occasionally falling on the riders as they passed under the branches.

Seven sat astride, the picture of confidence, her hair done up in it's usual impeccable fashion. Picard had insisted she ride the more experienced horse, since he had far more practice riding. As this was only Seven's second time horseback riding and Picard chose an easy course for the pair, he preferred not to take chances. Taking back a bruised and broken Seven of Nine to Captain Janeway was not his idea of a good time.

While they had been discussing the Borg earlier and thoughts from his own past had overtaken him momentarily. He cleared his throat and returned to his train of thought.

"Perfection is an admirable goal, yes, but the ends do not necessarily justify the means. We were both taken against our will, our personal freedoms violated."

"Someone told me once that perfection sometimes necessitated selfishness," she stated, ducking under a low branch.

"That's not perfection, that's greed."

"Perhaps." She pursed her lips and kept her eyes on the road in front of her. "I have...contemplated that perfection would eventually reach a stopping point--"

"A dead end?"

"Yes, after all, would they not eventually assimilate all there was worth assimilating? They would reach perfection but would not their progress end there? And what one mind deems perfection another may find lacking."

"Are you saying that you find the Borg perspective less than perfect?" He was a little shocked, he had expected quite a different argument from Seven of Nine Tertiary adjunct to Unimatrix 01.

"It could use refinement." Picard could see there was a lot he could learn from this young woman.

Captain Janeway was surprised to receive a communication from B'Elanna Torres later on in the day who requested a meeting with the Captain. She prayed it was not going to be another resignation. B'Elanna arrived half and hour later. "Captain, do you mind if we get out of here, I've had enough of Starfleet for the moment."

"Of course"

They wandered down to the pier, and leaning against the battered white wooden railing looked out at the bay.

"Captain, I wanted to see you because I think I need some advice." Began B'Elanna, "Did you know they have offered me a teaching position at the Academy?"

"Yes I was aware of that. I had to second the recommendation."

"Second it? I thought you suggested it to them."

"No, it was quite a surprise-" Kathryn stopped, "No that came out the wrong way, I think you would make a great instructor."

"I see... so you think I should take it?"

"I don't know B'Elanna... it really is up to you."

"Do you have any idea who came up with this idea?"

"Of course, it was Commander Parsons your old Engineering professor." Said Kathryn, "Do you remember when I appointed you Chief Engineer, and I showed you the comments he put on your record?"

"How could I forget? So why would he recommend me?"

"Mm... well why don't you go and see him?"

"I think I've had enough reunions to last a lifetime."

"Have you seen your family?"

"Yes, it was the first time my parents and I had been in the same room since I was five years old."

"How did it go?"

"It lasted ten minutes before my mother attempted to draw a Bat'leth on my father." There was an amused glint in B'Elanna eye. "I ended up seeing them separately. It was so weird, I've spent my whole life seeking my father's approval, trying to be more human to please him... then when I finally achieved something that he could be proud of, it didn't matter to me at all..."

"I think I understand, B'Elanna." Janeway didn't qualify her statement, but B'Elanna could tell she knew exactly what she was talking about. "And your mother? How was she?"

"Oh fine, she remarried while I was gone... a Klingon this time. I think she learnt her lesson! I'm going to visit them soon."

"How is Tom?"

"I don't know, I haven't seen him much since we got back. He's been busy catching up with old friends." She looked out across the water, the breeze ruffling her hair.

Kathryn knew there was more going on, and thought it was best not to pry.

"How is Seven?" Inquired B'Elanna politely.

"She's great. We've been spending time with my family, seeing a few friends... and we managed to get away for a few days to do nothing."

"That must have driven you both insane!"

Kathryn laughed, "Oh don't worry, we found a few things to occupy us."

"You know I wish I hadn't judged her so harshly. It's probably too late now, but maybe one day I'll get to know her."

"It's never too late B'Elanna."

"How did you know?" asked Torres.

"Know what?"

"That she was a good person. That there was more to her than the Borg implants."

"I didn't at first, none of us could have known." Kathryn went on, "I guess I just gave her a chance... I was too stubborn to give up, I wanted her to know the beauty of humanity... and she ended up showing it to me..."

"I hope that one day I'll know a love like that."

"You will B'Elanna, you've just got to take a few chances along the way. God knows it took me a few."

B'Elanna looked at Captain Janeway, she had softened considerably now they were home. She had a youthful appearance, like a huge weight had been lifted off her shoulders. B'Elanna wanted to know that kind of joy for herself. It was about time she threw caution to the wind.

"You know Captain, all my life I've taken the hard road. I've gone out of my way to make things hard for myself. Maybe that is my lesson... maybe I have to learn to seize the good opportunities when they are presented?" She paused for a moment, "I think I'm going to take this job."

"Good for you B'Elanna." Kathryn thought for a moment, "Well at least there will be quite a few Voyager crew members close by."

"You'll be here too?"

"Yes, Seven and I have both accepted positions at Starfleet Command. We're not going anywhere for a while. And there's something I need to tell you." She took a breath, she had been avoiding this.

"The Doctor's gone."

B'Elanna snapped her head around to burn a glance at Janeway. "What? What do you mean gone?"

"He just disappeared. No trace of his programming even exists. Seven can't find any explanation. He could have been deleted, by himself?or someone, we don't know."

"Maybe things at Starfleet aren't as rosy as we thought."