Chapter 11: Who ya gonna call?
“I am a hunter… you are my prey!”
“Uh oh…”
Sikar gulped as the Hirogen looked down on him. This was not good…
“Any last words?”
“Well, actually I…LOOK! A FLOCK OF WILD REDSHIRTS!”
Excited (but not the giddy-schoolgirl kind of excited), the alien looked over his shoulder. Of course, all the redshirts that had survived so far, had already fled the scene. Contrary to popular belief, not all redshirts are braindead morons. They are just extremely unlucky, which is the main reason for their unfortunate spot at the bottom of the Star Trek food chain. Only the strongest redshirts can survive long enough to be noticed by one of the main characters. As soon as one of them calls a redshirt by his real name, a chemical reaction is triggered in the brain. The redshirt forms a cocoon (often referred to as an “environmental suit”) and after spending a few days maturing in a random Borg cube, a broken down shuttlecraft, or a collapsed cave on a dangerous alien planet, he finally emerges as a beautiful butterfly ensign.
Disappointed (and quite peeved!), the Hirogen turned back to Sikar, or rather, the spot where he had been standing a few seconds ago before he took his chance and bolted.
“Perhaps this hunt will be more challenging than I first anticipated”, he mused out loud, for some reason unaware that this made him look like an complete idiot. Or perhaps he did know, but he simply didn’t care. The guy was seven feet tall and had a weapon to match, so it’s not like anyone was stupid enough to ask him.
“You were the one that had us running circles on deck nine for almost 15 minutes!”
“Well, if you didn’t…”
Yannik rolled her eyes and turned to the bickering authoresses.
“Can’t you guys be quiet for just TWO MINUTES? I’m trying to find us a way back to our quarters and I can’t concentrate with all that…”
“Hey!” Darkninga protested, “Who put you in charge?”
“I’m the oldest!”
“No, you’re not!” Firebirdgirl objected, “Doec is! Right, Doec?”
She looked over her shoulder, but the corridor behind her was empty
“Doec? Doec! Where are you? Come on, this is not funny!”
Unfortunately, Yannik’s roommate did not show up. To make matters worse, the explosions stopped and eerie techno music softly started playing in the background.
“Oh crap…” SuperSanne muttered under her breath, her eyes nervously darting from side to side.
“Great,” Istarwyn exclaimed, “I’ve seen this show more than a thousand times, and we have just officially been boarded by the aliens!”
“How do you know that?” Aseawen asked
“The creepy soundtrack, lack of senior officers, flashing alarm lights… and of course the sound of grunting and heavy footsteps that seem to be coming closer every second”
They all listened to what seemed like a group of elephants stampeding through the corridors. The sound grew louder and louder, until the authoresses suddenly stood face to face with five Hirogen hunters, none of the appearing to be very friendly.
“We are the hunters….” The biggest and most menacing looking of them started, “you are our…”
“EEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEKKKK!”
The poor Alpha never got the chance to finish his speech. Startled by the extreme amount of noise their prey had managed to produce, he doubled over and clutched his ears in agony.
“STOP THAT RIGHT NOW!” he yelled, but they had already ran of.
“So long, suckers!” Aseawen yelled over her shoulder as they rushed inside a nearby turbolift. She stuck out her tongue and waited for the doors to shut. Unfortunately, they did not and the Hirogen were now closing in on them at an alarming speed.
“Uh oh… the doors are stuck!”
“Sikar was right, Turbolifts always break during an emergency!” Slayer panicked. “Darkninga, do something!”
“Ack! Why me?”
“If you can sabotage Seven’s alcove, surely you can fix the doors!”
“That’s not the same….AAARGH!”
Darkninga saw something moving in the corner of her eye and barely dodged an energy blast.
“They’re shooting at us!”
“Stand back everyone!” Aseawen shouted heroically as she kicked the controls of the Turbolift. Sparks flew everywhere, but somehow, it had worked! The Alpha made a mad dash and reached for Istarwyn’s hair, but with a smooth “whoosh”, the doors closed just in time. The background music faded away and the soft humming of the machinery filled the lift.
“That…was…so…COOL!” Darkninga laughed, “We’re being chased by REAL Hirogen hunters! I wonder if they’ll sign some of my posters…”
“You mean before, or after they have killed us and made trophies out of our intestines?” Firebirdgirl asked sarcastically, “I think we should just go to Deck 12, sneak back to our quarters and hide under our beds until Captain Janeway blows them out of the airlock or something like that.”
Aseawen was about to ask if they could make a quick stop at Engineering, but her combadge suddenly started beeping
“Ack! What did I do? What did I do?”
“I think you’re being hailed”
“I am? Cool!” she grinned and tapped the device with her right hand, like she had seen on the show.
“Aseawen here!”
“Doec here, I’m… wait a minute…Aseawen?”
“Yeah, it’s me, why?”
“Uhm…I was trying to hail Yannik, can you put me through?”
“What for?”
“Well, uhm… you see…”
There was some whispering in the background. One of the other persons was definitely Sikar mumbling something incoherent, but there was another voice that seemed very familiar, but it was too soft to hear who it was
“Just put me through, okay?”
That sounded just a little too desperate…
“Nooooooooooooooo, I don’t think so!”
“Aseawen, just give me your combadge already!” Yannik demanded, impatient.
“AAAAAH! They’re coming! They’re coming!” she heard Sikar shouting.
“Please, just give me someone else!” Doec begged, “Darkninga, Slayer, the Borg Queen, anyone!”
“Ooh, my hand is wavering over my combadge,” Aseawen sang evilly, “I might accidentally hit it and break the connection!”
“ALRIGHT! ALRIGHT! I wasn’t paying attention and went left at Astrometrics where I bumped into Sikar who was being chased by a Hirogen hunter! We took a Jefferies tube back to Deck 12, but the ladder was broken, so we had to get out at Deck 11...”
Aseawen’s eyes suddenly grew as big as dinner plates.
“D-Deck 11?”
Doec gulped and they heard someone else cursing quite loudly in the background.
“Yeah…we’re trapped in Engineering…”