A Simple Game

In all his life, Chakotay had never thought he would find a woman like her. No matter where he was, no matter what fantasy persisted in his head, none would ever come to compare to the reality that was Seven of Nine. She had been in his every thought, his most intimate dreams, and there had been scarcely a moment in which he did not wish to be with her, in more ways than one.

That's why it hurt so much to see them together.

One look, and he had known that he never had a chance, not in a million light years. There was no competing; no one else was in her life more prominently, closer to her, or knew her better than Captain Janeway.

But it went beyond that.

He knew Kathryn. Hell, he had even once been in love with her, so he knew the signs. The way her head tilted when she was talking to Seven was all the proof he needed to tell him that he had been out of the running before the race had even begun. Add on to his observations of her behavior the immense amount of time the two spent together and there was no mistaking it for a "friendship".

But what could he do about it?

Surely, he had long ago reconciled his emotions regarding both women, individually or otherwise, but there was something else wrong with the picture:

They weren’t together.

In truth, Chakotay had, at times, thought that Kathryn had finally sealed it, finally taken their relationship to the next level, but he was always proved wrong. He knew that his Captain would tell him when it happened and, no matter how many stolen glances and unseen caresses had been shared by the two, she had said nothing to make him believe that she and Seven were anything more than they appeared to be.

Yet, there was that feeling, there was that uncertainty of what was what, deep down in the pit of his stomach. Chakotay took a long, tired yawn, and tried to concentrate on his routine schematics checkup instead of the two missed loves of his life.

"So...any plans for this evening, Commander?"

Chakotay looked up at Harry and wondered whether he should even respond. He was not exactly in the mood for another one of Harry and Tom's holodeck programs, but he liked Harry and he sure as hell could use the conversation to keep his mind on something else.

"I don't think I'll be doing anything tonight, Ensign, but I assume you are?"

He gave Harry a smile which Harry returned, but was internally unsure how to interpret it.

"Well, Tom and I have this bet going that, together, we could beat Seven in a game of darts. You know, if we added our scores together? And she's finally decided to take us up on the challenge."

Chakotay laughed inside. Had she really? He wouldn’t be surprised if she won, too, even with the steep odds. He'd seen Harry play before and, when he was nervous (which he always was around Seven), he wasn't going to be much of a help to Tom.

"I don't think I'll be joining you, Harry--"

"But, sir, "Harry interjected, never knowing when to give up, "the Captain has even agreed to come, to make sure the match is clean. Not that I don't trust Tom, or that she doesn't trust him, but I think she just wants to be there to support Seven and--"

"Harry."

He looked up, realizing that he had clearly been rambling, and blushed brightly.

"Sorry, sir, I just really wanted you to come."

Chakotay smiled, strangely warmed that Harry wanted him there, but still declined.

"But be sure to let me know how it goes, Harry."

Kim nodded, but was clearly disappointed. He had been waiting all day to find the right moment, the right way to ask Chakotay to come, and his efforts were all for naught. If only he could just bite the bullet and talk to him! He was tired of waiting for excuses to spend time with Chakotay.

"You know, Harry, I'm off in ten minutes..."

Harry's eyes glowed at the possibilities that sentence entailed.

"Maybe you'd like to go to the holodeck with me and go rock climbing? I know a great place, it was on earth..."

Harry was hearing everything Chakotay was saying, but damn him if he cared past the first few syllables. An entire hour or more, completely alone? What more could he have hoped for?

"I'd be happy to...sir," he said, catching the way Chakotay was observing him. He didn't want Chakotay getting suspicious. At least, not yet.

As much as Harry was dying to get in close quarters with Chakotay, Chakotay was equally desperate to forget the images of Seven and Kathryn in his head. It was not as if they did it to hurt him on the contrary, he knew they both cared for him immensely but it hurt just the same.

But, when he looked at Harry's beaming face at the offer to join him, Chakotay began to forget about his woes.

Just one hour after Chakotay and Harry entered the holodeck, there was an explosion on the engineering deck. Nothing that would cause major alarm, but B'Elanna was anything but happy to have her husband hounding her about coming to the holodeck that evening when she had sparks singeing her hair!

"Tom, I don 't want to come and see you lose to Seven when I could be sleeping."

Tom gasped, feigning complete and absolute offense.

"Lose? Lose to Seven? B'Elanna, did you hear me correctly? Both Harry and my scores combined against just Seven's alone?" He laughed heartily as though B'Elanna had told a very funny joke, but he was clearly uncomfortable. "Honey, this game is practically in the bag."

"Whatever you say, dear," she replied between the bright blue blasts of light coming from her tool. She had just caught Tom's eye and had smiled brightly when Seven entered the room.

"Ah, Seven, we were just talking about you!"

Seven eyed Tom suspiciously B as she always did B and spoke almost sarcastically (for Seven, anyway) as she went to aid B'Elanna.

"I do believe that phrase indicates you were speaking ill of me, correct? I would not be so cheerful delivering such news, Lt. Paris. "

B'Elanna chuckled behind the console as Seven joined her and Seven gave her a quick, unexpected smile. It was funny, thought B'Elanna, how far their relationship had come. Just a year ago, Seven would have been entirely uptight around B'Elanna, doing just as she was asked and saying nothing that did not apply to the work at hand. Now, she was practically joking! It was wonderful progress and B'Elanna appreciated being one of the few people Seven felt that comfortable around.

"What is the problem?" Seven asked, returning to business as usual.

"The problem," B'Elanna said, her voice rising and falling in emphasis, "is that no one," her voice grew louder so those around her could hear it, "can adjust the levels in the bio pacs unless I am holding their hand while they do it!"

Seven raised an eyebrow, but said nothing. She grabbed a tool identical to B'Elanna's and began to remove some of the ion damage.

"You would never know that this was done by a lieutenant commander, would you?" B'Elanna was speaking almost in a whisper, but she knew that Seven's superior hearing would catch every word. Seven leaned toward B'Elanna and asked if this mistake had been made by the same person who had almost caused a warp core meltdown just one month before. When B'Elanna nodded, Seven got a rather dangerous look in her eyes.

"Don't you go doing anything about it, Seven," B'Elanna warned. She valued the stress-relieving factor of venting to Seven and she wasn't about to have that compromised by Seven's tendency towards rash action in the case of imperfection.

Seven nodded, understanding, but B'Elanna could see the cogs turning in Seven's mind as if the nano probes had opened a little window into Seven's brain.

"So, are you nervous about tonight?" she asked, desperate to get Seven's one-track mind on another path.

"I am not," Seven responded, sounding as confident as ever. "I have done the math and run simulations; I am guaranteed success, even with the combined efforts of your husband and mister Kim."

B'Elanna smiled and shook her head. Seven never overlooked a single angle. If there was ever anyone more competitive than B'Elanna, Seven would most certainly be that person. Seven did not just hate to lose, she could not lose. It simply wasn't an ability that Seven possessed.

B'Elanna watched as Seven worked and wondered if she wouldn’t't come and watch after all.

"Captain, just the person I wanted to see."

"Oh, is that so, Neelix?" Janeway leaned against the counter in the mess hall, her eyes focused provocatively on the chef, causing him to redden in spite of himself.

"Why, yes, it is," he said, smiling in his usual pleasant manner. "I've heard that you are going to be at this...competition tonight, yes?"

Captain Janeway nodded in the affirmative but rolled her eyes, knowing the sort of questions that were to follow. But she already had her answers ready for what Neelix had in mind to ask in regards to Seven:

"I'm just there to make sure it's all in good fun," she said, in response to Neelix's alluding inquiry as to why Janeway was attending. "As observer and nothing more, Neelix. Surely you know Tom well enough to see my point?"

Neelix nodded, but he knew there was something she wasn't telling him. If only he could pry from her very closed mind the thoughts she hid so well in her responses!

"Well, I just thought it a bit odd that you would show up for so...silly a thing, Captain, that's all. I know you enjoyed Fair Haven, but this is just a little dive that Tom made up for the sole purpose of finally beating Seven at somethingBwhich, in my opinion, isn't going to happen anyway, even with Harry." Neelix handed another plate of what looked suspiciously like moldy cheese to a crewmen and wiped his hand on a cloth. "I just think that you might have ulterior motives, Captain," he said, a laugh in his voice and a twinkle in his voice. But Kathryn wasn't biting.

"For your information, Neelix, I enjoy Tom's little dives, as you so lovingly put it, and I'm not going to be there for any other reason that to see Seven win, as I'm sure many of the attendees will."

Neelix struggled for some comment that would lengthen the discussion, but he was not quick enough to keep Janeway's attention.

Chakotay swept in and gave his Captain an effortless smile that made her warm inside. She had loved him once, and there was still some things that he did to her against her will. It made her inexplicably happy when she was in his presence and it made her happier still to be taken away from the increasingly prying questions.

"Care to join me for a bite?" Chakotay asked with a grin. Kathryn accepted the invitation and sat as he asked Neelix for a special meal that apparently made Neelix so ecstatic that he completely forgot his hunt for the truth.

"What did you ask for, Commander?"

He smiled mischievously and sat across from her, looking like a small boy who had just thought of something rather clever.

"I asked him for that wonderful dish he'd made three weeks ago, his "famous" wild mushroom stew."

Janeway tried to force her smile down, but it was strong.

"You mean the one that takes half an hour to make?"

Chakotay grinned.

"Oh, you are terrible."

"Not terrible," he said," just creative."

"Well, morality aside, why do you look like you just jumped in a lake?"

Chakotay laughed, looking down at the grey t-shirt he was wearing, which was entirely saturated with sweat.

"Harry and I just finished a two hour bout of rock climbing," he said, his face lighting up. "I haven't had such a good time since that day you and I went white water rafting and you fell in and started screaming "Chakotay, if you ever make me do this again, I'll skip the brig and just shoot you!"

Kathryn laughed, her entire face beaming with laughter. She remembered that day fondly, despite the terrible rapids. Soaked and laughing, she had flopped off onto the shore when Chakotay re-set the program, as fish flopping in her lap. He had lifted her up and insisted she get warm by fire rather than just by ending the program. They had sat there, his arms around her, for hours. Now, she wondered what Seven would have made of the situation. Probably insisted that they never run that program again and developed a hatred for fish.

Chakotay was obviously thinking very pleasant thoughts surrounding that time too, but his face suddenly froze.

"Don't look now, but she's heading this way."

Kathryn froze at Chakotay's words. She certainly knew whom he was referring to, but she would be damned if she let on that it affected her in the slightest.

"I don't know who you're talking about, Commander."

Had he read her thoughts? Had he known that, even when recalling pleasant times with him, she thought of Seven? She felt rather guilty about it, not even knowing if it was true.

Seven stopped just short of the Captain and Chakotay's table, a smile creeping across her face. She took the last few steps, closing the gap between her and them, and inclined her head towards Commander Chakotay.

"Commander, Captain."

Kathryn turned to Seven, giving her ever-impressive impressions of someone who was not nervous, and offered Seven a seat.

"Oh, no, I am not in need of nutrition," she said.

"Seven, please, sit anyway,if you're not busy, I'm sure the Commander and I would enjoy your company."

Kathryn felt like smacking herself. She did this every time Seven was around; she got so disoriented that she didn't realize what she was doing. It was sort of like the drugs that had been so widely abused in humanity's past: She knew she was better off with less, but the slightest taste made her think she needed more.

Seven tilted her head, examining Captain Janeway for falsehood, but there was none, as she had suspected. She sat next to the Captain and crossed her legs.

"What was it you were discussing?" Seven asked, wanting to be able to contribute as soon as possible. Much as she denied it, Seven thrived on idle chat. In fact, she loved it. There was nothing she would have liked more than to spend an entire day having intellectual discussions with her Captain, but there wasn't anything in the world that could make her admit that. She was only glad Commander Chakotay so often gave Seven that opportunity. It was to her benefit that she had never been aware of his attraction to her.

"We were just reminiscing, Seven, but I think we're more interested in this game of darts that Harry is so eager for me to attend. I'm hoping you can convince me to go?"

Seven could barely contain herself. The only person around whom Harry had more trouble merely functioning than Seven was the Commander. She could only imagine what it had taken for Harry to ask Chakotay to come that night, when it would only be a group of seven or so, giving them ample "alone time". Well, at least he was making progress, she thought wryly, looking at her Captain for just one extra moment.

"I do not think you should waste your time, Commander," she said, but then she realized how hurt Harry would be if she did not succeed in ensuring Chakotay's presence. She empathized because she knew how she would have felt, had the Captain declined to come.

"But it would be enjoyable for you to see Tom Paris lose to me again."

Chakotay's eyes grew wide and he immediately looked to Kathryn. Had she really just said that? They thought in unison. Seven had certainly gained a biting sense of humor!

"Would you like to make a little wager, if you are so sure of your success?"

Seven didn't even blink an eye.

"What do you have to offer?"

Chakotay put his elbows on the table and Seven wondered why in the world this man had not showered lately! Goodness, she had never seen the Commander so unkempt!

"Where have you been?" she asked suddenly. Both Chakotay and Kathryn laughed.

"I was rock climbing with Harry, but let's get to this offer thing...hey! You know what, that gives me an idea."

Seven could not see what idea that could have given him, because she had already arrived at an entirely different one. Harry and Chakotay on the holodeck alone? She could only wonder what Harry must have been thinking. Though she was not particularly close to Harry Kim, she did not wish for his heart to be hurt. As far as Seven had seen, Chakotay was not attracted to men.

"If Tom and Harry win, you have to come climbing with Harry and I next time."

Seven considered it and thought it reasonable.

"And when I win?"

Seven have tried to temper her superior attitude, but this was simply something she would not allow to be otherwise. She was certain she was going to win and, unbeknownst to her, Chakotay knew that too.

"If you win..." Chakotay's voice trailed off as though he was actually thinking up something on the spot, "I'll give you and the Captain an hour of my holodeck time to rock climb alone instead."

Kathryn practically stopped breathing.

"I accept."

Kathryn did stop breathing.

"Seven, you can share my holodeck hours anytime, you don't need to risk it."

Seven was warmed by that assurance, but her eyes were already on the prize. If she won, she would get an hour alone with the Captain, uninterrupted time doing physical activity. If she lost, she might have the chance to convince Harry to take action or prove to him that his interests were best placed elsewhere. In essence, she won no matter what the outcome.

"Shake on it?"

Kathryn was about to die. Could she really be hearing this? Had she really spoken, telling Seven that she would gladly spend time with her, alone? For no reason other than she could? As Seven shook the Commander's hand, she swore that Seven smiled oddly at her, but, then again, she also thought she was in a parallel universe, so she wasn't very trusting of her eyes.

"Good then." Chakotay rose, saying goodbye to the Captain, who didn't hear a word he said, and to Seven, who wasn't concerned about his absence. He stopped only to get his tray from Neelix, which he was going to take to his quarters. As he walked the halls, he wondered if he knew what he was getting himself into.

"It's better than waiting for them to get on with it, right?" He wasn't very convincing, but he was able to delude himself that his plan was a good one. He would let Fate decide; if Seven lost, he might have a chance with her, because the only way she would lose would be if she lost on purpose. Then he would know that she was actually interested.

If she won, he was going to be eating in his quarters a little more often than he would prefer to in order to avoid dining with the two he was increasingly fearing would become a pair.

THUNK

THUNK THUNK.

Seven closed her eyes. When she opened them, the sound of the darts hitting the board made her grin. She had just-for the third time in a row-hit the bull's eye. With three darts. At once.

Seven rubbed her hands together, nervously stepping up to the dart board and removing the darts one at a time. She was confident, yes, but nervous none the less. She knew that she would win. Or, at least, she would do everything within the limits of her abilities, which were considerable. However, worry as she did, she had that feeling in her torso, just above her abdomen and just below her chest. It was a sensation like warm liquid, injected right into her body. She knew what that feeling meant and it made her positively brim with anticipation.

With every toss of the darts, Seven began to accept that she had no reason to be concerned. THUNK, THUNK, THUNK, the darts hit their pre-destined spots in the one, two, and three sections. This modified game called "base-ball" was something that she understood to be rather simple, almost an insult to her superior capabilities and intelligence. She simply had to get all three darts into the smallest section each time, and she would defeat Tom and Harry. In the simulations, she had actually made Harry better at the game than she surmised him to be, and still, she was given a large margin for success. Seven smiled to herself, one of the few methods of personal expression she rather enjoyed, and pulled the darts from the cork for the final time in her warm up.

THUNK THUNK THUNK.

"Practicing, Seven?"

Seven did not show her shock at being interrupted. Instead, she simply turned to see who it was that would be so rude.

"Computer, end program. "

"Oh, don't stop on my account, Seven, I'm not here to spy."

Tom smiled his best non-committal smile and cupped on hand against the other.

"I do not believe you would, Lieutenant," she said, rather convincingly too, "but I have just finished."

"Oh, is that so? Good, then I'll just practice then." He took a breath to active the program, but Seven interrupted him.

"Lieutenant, might I speak with you?"

Tom looked at Seven warily, wondering what sort of trick she was trying to pull. Well, whatever it was, it wasn't going to work!

"Sure, Seven." He practically waltzed over to her and his swagger immediately reminded her of why she preferred his counterpart to him. "What did you want to talk about? You're not thinking about pulling out, are you?"

Seven shook her head.

"Well, then what is it?"

Now it was time for the show. Seven had learned much from the Doctor, but there was one thing that Seven had yet to put into practice: persuasion.

"I think that you are aware of my relationship with the Captain?"

Tom thought for a moment about what, exactly, she was meaning to say and decided that, with Seven, it was as innocent as it should have been. He nodded.

"And you are aware that she will be in attendance?"

Again, he nodded.

"But are you also aware of your partner's affections for another who will be attending, affection in the same nature as mine toward the Captain?"

Tom looked at Seven as though she were an odd piece of fruit he was considering purchasing. What did she mean by that, "affections in the same nature"? What was he missing?

"Do you mean to tell me Harry has a crush on somebody, some one who's going to be here tonight?"

Seven nodded, too wrapped up in her own work of fiction to notice that Tom had not known at all that she had feelings for the Captain. And he had laughed when B'Elanna had suggested it! Damn, he thought. One more thing that the missus had gotten right that he had been entirely off base on. But he had been so sure Seven reciprocated Chakotay's feelings!

"I believe that you know him rather well."

Suddenly, Tom had bigger things to concern himself with than Seven's sexual preferences.

"HIM?!?"

"Yes, him," Seven said, as though Tom were over reacting about something as mundane as her telling him what color each of the deck's carpets were, one by one. "I believe that you should be aware of your friend's preference for males, correct?"

Tom could not believe what he was hearing!

"But," he stuttered, searching for something that would prove Seven wrong, "what about Libby?"

"I think that Harry has always been looking for a way to please his parents. His parents would be pleased with a marriage to Libby. However," she said, pacing around him a bit, now aware that she had an edge, "aboard Voyager, he has no need to concern himself with his family's homophobia."

Well, that made sense, but it just wasn't coming together. Tom had never so much as seen Harry look at another guy too long, let alone allude to anything near sexual interest. Who could have possibly peaked Harry's interest without setting off alarms with Tom?

"I believe Harry is completely infatuated with Commander Chakotay."

"No. Way. In hell."

"I do not see what is so hard to accept." Seven cocked her head, eyeing Paris for a moment. She had not anticipated that he would be averse to homosexuality and it frightened her. Had she been wrong to take this opportunity? Would he be repulsed by her request?

"Seven, you had me up to there."

"But, do you not notice that the Ensign and the Commander spend their leisure time together quite often? That Ensign Kim uses any reason to be around the Commander during his shifts?"

Tom thought about it, but he knew that to be true of a couple guys, more so in the "being around him during his shifts" department. There were ex-Maquis that always tried to spend extra time around him rather than other Starfleet officers. Harry wasn't around Chakotay any more than Tom was and Tom didn't want to sleep with him!

"Seven, Harry looks up to Chakotay. I think you're reading into that too much."

But Seven was as certain as Tom had ever seen her.

"Ensign Harry Kim is as romantically interested in the Commander...as I am in the Captain."

There, she had said it. She thought that he would be able to handle it like an adult, but his face looked shocked, if not disgusted.

"You disapprove?" She said it cautiously, not wanting him to overreact. Tom gasped for air like a fish out of water, completely at a loss for word. Seven wasn't just disappointed, she was scared.

"I will no longer waste your time, then," she said, heading out of the holodeck, but Tom stopped her with one arm. He held her still at his side, still looking off to the spot she'd been standing at only a moment ago as he spoke.

"I approve Seven. I just wasn't ready for it, that's all."

His head sank a little.

"I wasn't ready to hear that Harry is gay, either."

Seven made to move again, but Tom turned to her this time.

"I don't think there is anything wrong with it, Seven, but what does this have to do with Harry and Chakotay? And more importantly, what the heck does it have to do with me?"

Seven stood up straight and took a deep, undetectably relieved breath, and explained.

"Whoa."

"Tatamis, how are you, my friend? Wonderful, wonderful, got your bets ready? Great, gonna be a good one, I'm tellin' you, too bad your buddy Jedel couldn't come, really, really a shame!"

Tom laughed, smiled, and gave the usual impression that he had not a care in world. The room was modestly full, three people around the pool table, one sitting at the bar, chatting it up with the bartender, and four more shooting at the dart board. Tom counted eight people and he didn't expect many more to arrive; it was bit of a private party.

"Harry, my man," he said, slapping Harry on the back as he took a seat next to him at the bar. "I'll take a whiskey on the rocks, Danny," he said to the weather-worn looking, middle aged man. He smiled at Tom and gave him a nod before ducking under the bar to fetch the drink.

"So," Tom said, laying his elbows across the bar, "Is Chakotay here yet?"

Harry shook his head, obviously dejected, but doing his best (which, unfortunately, wasn't very good at all at that moment) to pretend that he wasn't anymore upset by Chakotay's absence than Tom would be. Tom, however, saw right through it and played around the fact.

"Really, I thought after your rock climbing adventure," he called it, joking on the border of mocking, "he'd be tailing you like a love sick puppy."

Harry turned to him, completely aghast at what he had said.

"Oh, come on, Harry, he just went on and on about how quickly you learned and how great a climbing partner you were." Tom paused, allowing his words to sink in and have their desired effect. "I mean, I couldn't wait to finish my shift so I could get away from him! No offense, I love you and Chakotay and all, but I really don't think my favorite subject of conversation is you, pal."

There seemed to be something very intricate going on behind Harry's bewildered expression, but Tom did not even acknowledge it.

"He was really talking about me all shift?"

Ah, thought Tom. Took him a second.

"Oh, yeah. Why?" He turned to Harry just as he blushed three shades until crimson.

"No reason," he lied, "I just didn't think I'd been that great of a companion." He looked out at the room, throwing his arms out emphatically. "I was just quiet because I was trying to concentrate on not falling and looking like an idiot in front of the Commander."

He had thrown in his title for effect, trying to get Tom off the scent of the trail, but Tom had all he needed. First B'Elanna about Seven and Janeway, now Seven about Harry and Chakotay? Tom was beginning to lose his touch! But he had a plan that would make those mistakes look like a tiny fleck on an impressionist painting.

"Uh oh, speak of the Devil himself."

Harry looked up toward the entrance and there was Chakotay, strolling through the swinging doors in a pair of jeans and a button down shirt that suited him. He looked like he should have been working in the garden or wrangling wild horses; Harry melted.

"Commander!"

Harry practically slid out of his chair trying to hide when Tom called Chakotay over. What the hell was he doing? thought Harry. He knew, if Chakotay sat next to him, he would be unable to control himself. He'd simply become a puddle at Tom's feet just as Chakotay came up to the bar.

Surprisingly, Harry was still a substantial form when the Commander took a spot next to Tom, deciding to stand instead of taking one of the stools.

"Harry here is just a little nervous, Commander."

Chakotay reached over with little effort and grabbed onto Harry's shoulder.

"I would have thought the climb would calm you down; it always does the trick for me and B'Elanna."

Harry couldn't have responded if he had wanted to because his brain had become a jumble of fireworks, signals firing off at random, the worst of the messages his brain was sending him being one that instructed him (in minute detail) how to rip Chakotay's shirt in half.

"But I'm sure you'll be fine," he said, with that painfully beautiful smile, releasing Harry's shoulder. Harry felt a warmth spreading from that spot to his entire body, least of which being-

"Are you ready to commence with the game, gentlemen?"

Harry hadn't even noticed Seven and Tom had been too busy gauging Chakotay's response to Harry's blushing to have even seen her come in. She was wearing what could only be described as something out of a dream: a pale blue dress that clung in all the right places. Damn it if she didn't know she looked good! She was blushing, even! The straps were thick and the hem stopped at her knees, flaring out in a deceptively sweet wave that went around the entire hem at a stark angle. The problem was, the dress was not something that should have looked that good. It was just pure Seven.

Tom, however, seemed to be the only guy with a pulse there! Chakotay said hello and turned back to Harry. At least he's interested in talking to him, thought Tom. And to think, Chakotay had been interested in Seven! Tom guessed that Chakotay had just healed quick, but Chakotay was just avoiding looking at her. It wasn't too hard, though, as Harry seemed rather interested in keeping up the conversation they'd started earlier about doing an extended rock climbing and camping trip when they'd saved up enough holodeck time.

"Did I not say it loud enough?" Seven asked, her head tilted slightly, uncomfortably aware of the eyes following her from all around the room.

"Oh, no, we heard you, Seven," Tom said. He leaned forward, away from Harry and Chakotay as not to be heard. "I thought you wanted to wait for the Captain?"

Seven did not respond as quietly, but Harry and Chakotay did not hear at thing.

"I believe it will be more effective if we begin before she gets here." She did not want to explain, but Tom appeared not to understand. She swallowed and spoke very quietly, suddenly aware of the man a ways off behind her as though he were trying to listen in. "I need time to relax." Seven blushed furiously at Tom's smile. "I easily become nervous around her and may not be able to make your defeat as believable if I am not calm."

Tom nodded and turned to Chakotay.

"Alright, Chakotay, I'm going to have to steal Harry from you," he said, at which point Harry buried his face in his drink.

"Of course," Chakotay said, "You better warm up, Harry?"

"Warm up?!?" he croaked.

Tom patted his back and pushed him off of the stool towards the dart board.

"No time to warm up, Harry, best to just jump right in! Excuse me, guys, but we're going to get started."

Tom rushed to the board and pulled off the darts. He issued a command to the computer and a new set appeared so they would have enough for Seven, too.

"Ladies first," he said, bowing theatrically to Seven. His friends laughed; he was doing a good job of making it look good.

Seven took three shots, one-two-three, no pausing, and hit the one section right on target each time.

And she's not calm? Tom thought. She could have beaten them with one hand tied behind her back!

Harry gulped, his hand wavering. He looked around the room and caught the eyes of a certain Commander, at which point he forced his nerves to stop dancing in his stomach. In all of the whispered talk, he never noticed Seven whispering commands to the computer.

THUNK, THUNK, THUNK, the darts hit the target with accuracy so unlike Harry, but not quite as good as Seven's. He'd gotten two out three into the smallest region. Harry sheepishly headed back to lean on the table behind the dart line to let Tom shoot. As expected, Tom got all three in the smallest zone. No one noticed , after his big smile and the hoots and hollering from his friends, that he gave Seven a wary look. She gave no indication that he had even looked in her direction.

Seven stepped up again, barely so much as flinching as she threw another three, perfect shots. Harry gulped down his stomach as he followed up with one perfect shot, two just off the mark. Seven was just whispering adjustments when the double doors opened with one, strong shove.

"...doesn't even think he's got anything more important to worry about..."

"Oh, B'Elanna," the deeper voice laughed, "you really should be easier on him..."

Seven tried to tune in without turning to look, but she couldn't really hear anything of what they were saying. She knew who it was: the Captain and B'Elanna. They were early, arriving only three rounds into the game. In fact, Seven had not even thought that B'Elanna was coming, so she was probably responsible for the Captain arriving earlier than anticipated.

"I thought you weren’t starting until seven thirty, Tom."

B'Elanna had obviously not been apprized to the situation and Seven began to worry that Tom had not accounted for all angles. The loss of her perfect nerve cost her: only two perfect shots. She had calculated that she had only room for ten percent error.

"Seven was eager to get it over with, I guess," he said, rather unconvincingly. B'Elanna caught on immediately, but Janeway did not seem anything other than comfortable.

"Uh huh," B'Elanna said dubiously. "Whoa!" she exclaimed as Harry hit two perfect shots. "Since when does Harry shoot that well?"

Tom coughed and gave B'Elanna a piercing glare as soon as the Captain looked in the other direction.

"What?" She mouthed it, aware that Tom must have been hiding something. She only hoped that he wasn't using some trick with the programming to make Harry better. She'd hate to see Seven devastated by a loss just so Tom could win some bets and bragging rights!

"Talk later," he replied. "Just trust me," he added in a whisper. B'Elanna shook her head at him, but she didn't pursue the issue. She really, really hope that he wasn't doing what she feared he was doing. But she didn't get the opportunity to see if the program was tampered with because she didn't want to raise suspicion.

"Man, Harry, you are on fire tonight!"

Tom gave him a high-five and eyed his wife, slight fear in his eyes. He wasn't worried about himself, but he was terrified for Harry. If B'Elanna blew their cover, what would Chakotay think of Harry? But, wouldn’t he buy it that it had all been Tom's idea? That story had never gotten old and never failed. Tom just prayed he wouldn’t have to take the blame or expose his friend prematurely.

THUNK, THUNK, THUNK!

Thank goodness, thought Tom, Seven hit all three that time. She had to be perfect if she was going to win while still letting Harry look good with the help of the computer. He was doing well enough that Chakotay was certainly paying attention to him, but not well enough to raise the suspicion of anyone expect Tom's ever (and rightfully so!) suspicious wife.

THUNK

"Wonderful shot, Tom."

THUNK, THUNK.

"Goodness, Seven," Kathryn said, hand on the highest button of her white cotton blouse, "I never knew you were so good at this game."

Seven blushed, but hid it well.

"It is a game of specific hand-eye coordination. I was made for this game."

Everyone took that as a joke, but the laughter made Seven blush even more. She turned to hide her face from the Captain.

THUNK.

"Nice one."

THUNK, THUNK.

"Your turn, Ensign Kim."

THUNK

"Uh, call me Harry, Seven."

THUNK, THUNK.

"Nice shot, Harry!"

"Thanks Commander..."

"Don't blush too much Harry."

THUNK, THUNK, THUNK.

"Man, Seven, you're not letting up, huh?"

THUNK, THUNK.

THUNK.

THUNK, THUNK.

THUNK, THUNK, THUNK, THUNK, THUNK, THUNK.

THUNK.

"Top that!"

THUNK, THUNK, THUNK.

"Show off..."

THUNK

Seven was by no means tired, but she was beginning to get nervous. She had not missed another shot since the fourth round, but she had gotten too close for comfort on number nine. On twelve, she had not gotten a single perfect shot. She had to get at least two bull's eyes to win, because Harry had just gotten three perfect shots on it and they counted as double.

"Here's nothing," Tom said, really meaning it. He only hit one bull's eye, but everyone seemed to take it as the nervousness that really was creeping up inside him. Seven stepped up, her feet planted at precise points.

Just two, she thought. She had gotten three at a time when she had practiced, hadn't she? Couldn't she manage a mere two, one at time?

"Should be easy," she whispered to herself, but she didn't feel like she believed it. She turned just a little to her left and, out of the corner of her eye, saw B'Elanna and the Captain talking in hushed voices. This did nothing for her concentration.

THWUNK.

The first one had missed.

Seven took a deep breath, hiding it behind the gasps of the others. Kathryn and B'Elanna had stopped talking and were now both watching Seven intently, almost fearfully.

"Come on, Seven," Kathryn whispered. "You can do this."

Seven swallowed hard, thinking that she might not ever be able to swallow again. She had just two shots left and both had to be perfect for the plan to work. She had to win, Harry looked good. But she had to win.

She held the one dart delicately and licked her parched lips. She concentrated on the red circle, but it was no use. She knew it just would not hit. She stepped back for a moment.

"You alright, Seven?" Tom asked it with concern, but his friends took it as banter and Kathryn grew irritated. "We can stop, if you're not feeling well."

"She can finish."

Everyone turned to see the Captain, her arms crossed threateningly, her eyes gleaming as though to just beg someone to say something in return.

Needless to say, the room remained silent.

Seven, unlike everyone else, was watching the Captain. Only three people in the room caught the soft smile that crossed both of their lips, and all of them should not have been shocked if Seven had simply crossed the room and kissed her. Instead, Seven turned, took both darts in her hand, and threw.

THUNK, THUNK.

"Dammit."

Seven fought her smile as she approached Chakotay immediately, ignoring the sighs of the other people that she did not know as they paid for their bets or the laughter of those who collected well from her success.

"You now owe me an hour of holodeck time, Commander."

There should have been a sadness in his heart, Chakotay found himself thinking. It was truly over, anything that ever could have been between himself and Seven, and yet...he felt just fine.

"I guess I do."

"I do not wish to accept."

Chakotay laughed and insisted that she take her winnings.

"I do not want it," she said, looking over her shoulder as the Captain eyed her from across the room, "but I would like to give it to someone else."

Chakotay shrugged.

"That's your choice, Seven. It's your hour."

Seven nodded and turned to Harry Kim.

"Ensign Kim, I wish for you to put my hour toward your week of camping with Commander Chakotay. "

Harry blushed red and stuttered his thanks, but Seven was no longer interested in him. She was more concerned with the success of the rest of her plan, of which Harry was not a part.

"Seven, you don't have to do that." Chakotay had grabber her forearm. She disengaged herself gently from his grip.

"I know that, Commander, but I think both you and Ensign Kim desire it more than I do."

It was the Commander's turn to be uncomfortable, but he could not say that he was surprised or upset by it. He just let Seven leave.

"Thank you."

You are welcome, she answered in her mind. Seven crossed the room to meet B'Elanna, who had been talking to a tall Bolian man and assumed her practiced position just left of her. She could see Tom and the Captain and observed unnoticed.

"Seven, you did amazingly," B'Elanna said as the Bolian left the holodeck. "I was impressed."

Seven nodded, not really hearing her but doing her best to look interested in what she was saying.

"But you were a little more worried about the Captain watching you than how you did, right?"

They were talking very softly now. Had Tom told her?

"Seven, are you even listening to me? Seven, I know about you and the Captain."

Seven did not look away from the Captain and Tom, but she had heard B'Elanna. She turned, very slowly, her eyes downcast, thinking that this was it; B'Elanna was going to ruin everything.

The Captain looked at Seven, her eyes studying her very closely, but Seven did not see this. She was looking down at the ground in front of B'Elanna, Torres placing her hand on Seven's shoulder as if to offer comfort.

"So, this entire thing was just a ruse to get Harry and Chakotay together?"

Tom frowned.

"It wasn't a ruse, Captain, more of...a creative orchestration."

Janeway shook her head at him. What was she to do about this? There were strict fraternization policies still in order but...there was something nagging at her. What do you have against it? she thought angrily to herself. Just because you haven't let yourself have anyone, no one else should be happy? She didn't know what to make of the situation. The regulations against homosexual behavior had long since been done with, but Janeway was still concerned about the stigma it would entail for Harry. Such a gentle person who would be hurt by the fallout with certain friends that was bound to happen. Could Harry handle it? More over, would he get his heart broken before he even got the chance to try?

"Tom, I hope you know what you're doing," she warned. She had known of Chakotay's feelings for her; could he really be attracted to Harry?

Paris simply shrugged and watched his wife talking to Seven. No doubt she was lecturing Seven on encouraging Tom in his schemes. What was so wrong in trying to help a friend?

"I just don't want Harry to get hurt, that's all."

Tom turned his attention back to the Captain and nodded.

"I don't either, Captain, but I don't think he will."

Their focus came to Harry and Chakotay, who were tucked away in a corner on the other side of the room. Chakotay was all but on top of Harry, speaking to him with their faces just inches apart.

"Seems his forgotten about Seven pretty quick," Tom said with a dry chuckle. Kathryn found herself smiling at the scene, Harry blushing up to his ears, Chakotay liberally applying his standard charm, perhaps with a bit of the flirtation he'd danced around her just a sparse few years ago.

"I'm glad he's gotten over Seven," Tom added, turning to the Captain, "I mean, everyone knows that she's not interested in him. Rumor has it that Seven isn't even interested in men."

Kathryn turned to Tom rather harshly, ready to defend Seven, but she found herself wondering what, exactly, she was defending. Coming from Tom, the comment probably meant that his buddies had over active imaginations. But Janeway knew well enough that there was truth at the core of every rumor.

"Yeah, I've heard from a few guys that they've heard her say she's not even interested in the male gender. I guess it's just wishful thinking on some of their parts, but I don't know. I've never known Seven to say something she didn't mean."

Tom looked at Seven and they locked eyes for a split second. He blinked twice.

Seven looked up at B'Elanna and was awash with relief at what she was saying because everything was going as planned, if not better, now that B'Elanna was on her side.

"I'm glad you've decided to do something about your feelings, Seven, even if it does involve Tom."

She smiled, releasing Seven's arm, when she realized that Seven was looking across the room. She followed her gaze and found her husband, smiling like a Cheshire cat, and the Captain, who tried and failed to look casual in catching a glimpse of Seven.

"He told her?"

Seven shook her head. "Not directly, no," she said. "But he has alluded to my attraction to females and he believes that this will lead the Captain to reconsider our relationship. He says that she will become suspicious."

B'Elanna shook her head in disagreement.

"Seven, why don't you just tell her how you feel? You're wasting your time this way."

Seven was no longer looking at the floor, but her eyes never looked directly into B'Elanna's. She knew Torres was right, but she had her own reasons.

"I do not wish to enter into an uncomfortable situation if the Captain does not reciprocate. This way, she may decide to alter the parameters of our relationship." She finally looked at B'Elanna, knowing that one should tell their "friends" the truth, or so she had been told. "B'Elanna Torres, I value your friendship and I wish to be honest. I know that Captain Janeway might do something she does not wish to do in order to ensure my happiness. This must not happen in this case."

B'Elanna found herself taking a sharp breath. Could Seven really believe that? It was not as if Janeway had not risked her own life for Seven's many times, B'Elanna admitted. If she would give up her life, could she refuse Seven her heart?

B'Elanna reached out to comfort Seven, wondering how hard it must be for her, being so close to the Captain, yet not close enough.

"Seven, I don't think that Kathryn would--"

"I believe she would," Seven said, her voice thick with sorrow. "I believe that Captain Janeway would feel obligated to return my feelings and I do not wish her to force herself...to love me."

B'Elanna felt a pang in her own heart at those words. How brave a front Seven put in place that, even as close as they had grown, Seven had hid this from her. B'Elanna brushed away a tear from the light skin and hushed Seven quietly, not wanting to attract attention.

But a certain woman was already tuned in on Seven and she had caught the look Seven gave B'Elanna when she looked up. She looked grateful for something and...she was leaning in to...embrace her?

Tom followed Janeway's line of sight and saw his wife, dwarfed by Seven in what looked like a rather desperate embrace. It lasted only a second, but it was long enough for him to know what Kathryn must have been thinking.

"They've grown very close," he said as a way of clarifying the sudden display of affection. "They even go to the holodeck together every once in a while. You know," Tom said, brightening, "you should go to the holodeck with Seven to do more than play hover ball. Maybe show her around Fair Haven?"

Apparently, his words were lost on her, because Kathryn's gaze and once again fallen to Seven and B'Elanna. Janeway had never been embraced by Seven. Wasn't she the closest to Seven? Wasn't she? Surely, Seven would not attach herself to someone she knew to be unavailable? And B'Elanna, she would never cheat on Tom, she was head over heels for him. A hundred similar thoughts were dashing through her mind and she didn't pay Tom any mind.

"I think I should get B'Elanna to bed, Captain."

Tom excused himself and Kathryn envied him, rushing over to his wife. He was so sure of what he felt and wasn't afraid to show it. Why couldn't she be that way? She was a Starfleet Captain, in charge of hundreds of crew members; she was built for self assurance! Yet, there she was, watching from across a slowly emptying room, wondering when her courage was going to return. What she wouldn’t have given to be as blindly bold as she had been at lunch!

"Thank you, B'Elanna," Seven said meekly as she laid her hand on Tom's forearm. B'Elanna gave Seven a smile and asked if she would be okay, if she wanted some company for the night, but Seven naturally declined. But she greatly appreciated the offer.

"Tom and I will be in our quarters, so don't be afraid to call if you need anything."

Seven nodded and watched them leave.

Taking a deep breath, Seven looked across the room, engaging the woman who had been watching her all night with just her pale blue eyes. She could almost feel her Captain quiver under her scrutiny and as quickly as she had initiated it, Seven ended the shared glance. She left without a word to the Captain, just as planned. Now all she had to do was "wait for the Captain to come to her", as Tom had said. She wondered how long that would take or rather, how long she could wait herself

Kathryn Janeway laid a hand on her shuddering chest, wondering when her heart had decided to take over the entire cavity of her chest. She let her other arm slide down at her side and breathed a deep, freer breath than she had been able to in the bar.

Did Seven even have an idea of what she did to her? At the rate she was going, Janeway was going to be on frequent sick bay visits for chest exams every damn day. All Seven had to do was look at her Blook at her! Band she was gone. Her heart fluttered and then stopped, her breath came only when she concentrated (concentrated, ha!), and her mind was no where to be found on any nature of radar. She was beginning to think that she was going to lose her hard earned reputation of steely nerves and composure for reasons no one-not even she-had ever expected.

Captain Janeway rested her head in her left hand. She needed to do something about this.

But what? She couldn't even get up the nerve to talk to Seven unless it had something to do with Astrometrics or the "crisis of the week . Oh yes, she thought, she'd just go up to Seven and ask her to go salsa dancing! Of course, that was it! She laughed aloud at herself.

"You're a fool, Kathryn."

A puff of breath blew the hair from her face. She was stuck, jammed between a Borg and a dark place. If she never told Seven how she felt...if she never asked if the rumors were true...Oh, who was she kidding? She'd move on, pretending that everything was alright, letting Seven fall for someone else. And Kathryn would grin like the idiot she was as if she were happy for her.

She was a fool.

Because, had she taken the time to listen to herself thinking, she would have noticed that there was a piece of the puzzle missing: Seven's feelings. If she had just stopped, thought about all the times she had thought Seven had been staring at her, the comments that she was certain could be interpreted to mean more than they seemed, she would have noticed that Seven did exactly what she did. Maybe that was their biggest problem; they were both so blinded by the fear of what might happen that never let anything happen.

Kathryn had noticed how nervous Seven had become when she and B'Elanna had entered and she felt terrible about it. It made her feel as if Seven was threatened by her very presence and the last thing she wanted was to do was make Seven uncomfortable, no matter how she felt about her.

What would Tom have said about all of this? she wondered. He probably would have laughed at her, said "Just shag her, Captain!" and given her a wink. She would have loved to have had the audacity of that man sometimes.

As she didn't think she could run to Seven of Nine and perform a Doctor-esque, impromptu confession, she'd have to settle for mulling over what Tom had said at the bar.

Could it be true, Seven really wasn't just picky? Janeway knew Seven regarded very few individuals onboard to be "good enough" for her. Was it possible that Seven had come to think the females were more suitable to her?

"What is she, a mating dog?"

Kathryn shook the line of thought from her head. She didn't know what she was doing, thinking about Seven like that. This wasn't about mathematically calculated compatibility! This was love! For all she knew, Seven could have been attracted to women even before she became a Borg. Kathryn certainly had her share of attraction before she even knew what to call her adolescent feelings: she'd had a crush on her male tennis coach at age seven, on her female history teacher as a pre-teen, so who knew? Seven could have been bisexual all her life.

But, she thought, Seven had never even shown the least of attraction to any man on the crew. Oh, what did it matter? Lesbian, bisexual, straight, Kathryn wasn't getting any closer to Seven! Thinking about it wasn't helping her, either. All she kept thinking about was what would happen after she poured out her soul. She was convinced that Seven would all but laugh in her face and would immediately run into the arms of the Doctor, or someone equally male. What if she went running to B'Elanna??? Perhaps Seven wasn 't concern with monogamy.

"Computer, what time is it?"

The computer beeped once and answered, "2300 hours."

Kathryn sighed. She'd been in her quarters for over two hours since the darts game and she was still thinking about Seven? She had it and she had it bad.

"Computer," she said, a thought occurring to her, "locate Seven of Nine."

The computer hummed and responded, "Seven of Nine is located in Holodeck two."

Janeway thought back to what Tom had said to her about B'Elanna and Seven in the holodecks and she wondered if her presumptions suspicions might be proved true.

"Computer, locate B'Elanna Torres."

The computer didn't even hesitate.

"B'Elanna Torres is in her quarters."

"Hmm," Kathryn thumbed her chin and pondered. Well, maybe she had been wrong about that. In fact, that entire idea of a relationship between B'Elanna and Seven was well off base, but Kathryn's interests were still peaked by the mysterious time Seven spent in the holodeck, with or without B'Elanna. She knew what she was planning to do was in clear violation of Seven's privacy, but she had to know.

The halls of Voyager always seemed to get unusually quiet after 1600 hours, despite the fact that one couldn't really tell the difference between day and night unless they consulted the computer. It was a sad fact that the crew of Voyager rarely got shore leave, so Kathryn didn't even feel tired or aware of the time as she headed to Holodeck two.

She went to enter, thinking that Seven would not have the precautions set, but the door remained shut. She knew that she could easily override the personal protocol (she had the authority as Captain, though she had never used it) but the fact that Seven had chosen to lock the holodeck made him think twice. What if Seven found out she had breached her privacy? And what if Kathryn had to explain? She knew a host of excuses she could us, but she knew that none would hold water with Seven. She would see right through her, as she always did.

Kathryn turned around and decided against threatening their friendship just to satisfy her curiosity, but there was a beep from the console exterior to the holodeck that made her turn back slowly. There was a message on the center of the console in red and white text, blinking. It looked important...

"I'll just make sure everything is alright," Janeway assured herself. She'd just make sure that there was no malfunction in the program, then she'd leave, no matter what the program details said. If Seven had locked the doors, nothing that important could be revealed simply by looking at the message, right?

Kathryn crept up to the left side of the door, coming up on her toes to see the upper console. There was a red sentence over top of a white one:

Program entering second half hour, it said in red. Beneath that, it announced that character "Janeway" had just entered stage "two".

"Stage two?" Kathryn stared off into the hallway and wondered what, exactly, stage two was. And why was she a character in Seven's program?

She couldn't really hope that...

"Computer, override privacy code, authorization Janeway one, one, one, alpha, one."

It was an almost insultingly simple code, but it was a standard one for Starfleet Captains so that any superior officer could open the programs used, if they were suspected to contain information that Starfleet needed. Kathryn knew that she was violating regulations by doing this. She knew it, and she ignored the constant gnawing feeling in her stomach as she entered despite that knowledge.

The doors sealed and then disappeared, transformed into the walls of a rather homey looking restaurant. There were photographs of old-Hollywood stars on the walls, random objects like pitch forks and Coca-cola signs hung up high, and the seats were wooden and thick. There were booths along the walls and-was that Seven?

"I do not think that you should have any more chocolate."

There was a deep, throaty laugh from the person sitting opposite Seven in one of the far booths, a laugh that Kathryn thought was strangely familiar, as though she had heard it in a dream. Seven's hair was tossed back in a loose pony tail, but the other woman's hair was down, large, soft curls at the bottom of her auburn hair. Whoever she was, Seven seemed to be completely enchanted with her, blinking gently at her as she sipped her sparkling water.

"And why wouldn’t I have more, Seven?"

Now she was sure she knew the voice. She slipped into a seat just a few booths from Seven and sat looking the other way in order to still be able to hear but not be seen. The woman sounded as though she had smoked in her youth, something Kathryn could relate too. Something about the voice was... attractive. It had a comforting quality to it.

"Because you have already had two servings and you will complain of a stomach ache later."

The woman seemed pacified by this and relented.

"Mam, may I get you something?"

Kathryn was startled by the arrival of the hologram and hastily told him that she would take a water. She was too on edge for coffee.

"Alright, Seven, I'm finished. Ready for our walk?"

Kathryn's ears perked up and she pushed back against the seat. The woman with Seven was getting up; they were leaving!

Kathryn searched the room for something, anything to help her slip out unnoticed as well. Then she saw the waiter.

"Excuse me," she said, grabbing his arm gently, "would you mind directing me in the direction of the bathroom?" She rose, standing in front of him so that he was blocking her from Seven's sight. All Seven saw on her way out was a woman with a reddish-brown bun turning to go to the bathroom.

"Let's go," Seven said a little absently, leading her date from the room. They slipped out the front door into the spring day.

Kathryn doubled back as soon as she heard the door open, all but running to look through the windows in the lobby.

"Mam, can I help you?"

She slipped past the hostess and eased out of the door when she was sure Seven and her partner were far enough away.

Who was she? Could it really have been B'Elanna? Maybe that's why Seven had done nothing about it; she was content with the holographic version. Or maybe she simply didn't want to risk telling the truth, like herself. Kathryn tried, with difficulty, to keep up with the two of them as they dashed into the meadow just in front of the restaurant, their sun dresses flying up in the breeze.

Was that Seven...giggling?

"You know, I'm glad you decided to come," Seven said, finally stopping to lean against a tree. Kathryn froze, peaking out from a thick oak just upwind of them. Her hand barely crept around the side of the tree.

"I'm glad I decided to come, too."

The woman was leaning in toward Seven, who was resting against the trunk, her hands at her side. A sun hat hung loosely from Seven's left hand and she dropped it when the woman touched her lips to Seven's.

Unable to control herself, Kathryn peaked around the side of the tree, desperate for a glimpse of...

Herself?!?

Seven smiled as the holographic Kathryn Janeway pulled away from her and turned toward the Captain's hiding place, picking up Seven's hat and mischievously dangling it in front of her.

Kathryn spun back and slumped against the tree. She had just watched herself kiss Seven of Nine!

But now she couldn't do anything about it! If she spoke to Seven, she was sure to know what she had done. There had to be some way.

"You want it back?"

Seven nodded, but the real Janeway didn't see her.

"Then come and get it!"

Suddenly, familiar footfalls were accelerating toward Kathryn's location. She had to think fast, but what could she do? Become invisible?

Before she had the chance to think, the hologram of herself was upon her.

"OH MY--"

"Computer, delete character of Janeway and leave her clothes."

The computer quickly replied, but it wasn't fast enough. Janeway had only just managed to push her uniform behind the tree when Seven decided to come after "her".

"You have not made this very difficult for me, Kathryn."

But you've made it plenty hard for me, Kathryn thought with sarcasm thick enough to cut with a knife.

"Do you wish to be given another chance?"

Kathryn gave her a smirk and could only hope that Seven had programed her character's personality close enough to the real thing.

"Maybe," she laughed, sounding only partly as uncomfortable as she felt. "Why don't I give you a chance?"

Seven mirrored her playful grin and inched closer to Kathryn.

"Why would I want that?"

Kathryn allowed Seven to come as close to her as Chakotay had come to Harry just a few hours earlier. There was no mistaking Seven's intentions when she slipped her hand into Kathryn's and pressed her body into her's, pushing Kathryn against the tree.

Kathryn couldn't breathe. Seven's face was inches from Janeway's; she was going to kiss her. Should I stop it? Kathryn asked herself. No, she couldn't. If she did, Seven would know that something was amiss and that would be much worse than letting Seven kiss her.

In fact, as Seven pressed her lips to Kathryn's, she was sure that everything else in the world was worse than kissing Seven. Seven tasted like sweet peach juice, the softness of her lips akin to the tender flesh of a perfectly ripened one, wrapped in only the thinnest pink layer. It felt like kissing eternity, the time fading out as though it were a rather unfounded notion that Kathryn had only heard about in passing.

Seven's nose graced Kathryn's cheek as she pulled back and Kathryn found herself fighting the loss of her lips.

"Not yet, Kathryn," Seven said, a touch of humor and expectance in her words. "At least, not here."

Janeway was gasping for air. If that was what it felt like, a mere kiss, then she feared anything more would cause permanent injury.

"Where, then, Seven?"

Kathryn asked it tentatively, like an undercover agent beating around the bush, looking for the right words that would confirm her suspicions.

Seven mulled it over, her eyes to the bright-blue sky, and she grabbed Kathryn's hand, clearly knowing where she wanted to go, for whatever she planned to do. On the promise of another kiss, Janeway followed, tripping as she tried to keep up.

Seven had pulled her for what felt like a good half mile before she slowed, allowing Janeway time to recuperate. Apparently, Seven either had not noticed Janeway's inefficiency or she had programmed the hologram to be slightly less capable than she, as the real Janeway would be, because she did not question her when she decided to slump against the door of the little cottage she'd be led to, rather than run right inside.

Not knowing if the hologram should have known the cottage or not, Janeway said nothing in reference to it. When she gained her breath, she only commented on the beautiful spring air, returning the amazing smile that Seven offered her so frequently.

Janeway found herself envying her holographic self more and more with each passing moment. Was this the sort of existence Seven had gotten her used to? Smiles at every turn, light touches whenever they were near, and a flash of daring want in her eyes whenever Janeway chanced to look directly at her. Kathryn felt a pang of guilt at knowing she was enjoying this without Seven's knowledge.

"Shall we enter? It is cooler inside."

Kathryn didn't feel hot at all, but she would do anything Seven wanted her to do. And that was not fueled entirely by her primary objective of keeping Seven convinced of her identity.

Just as she rose, Seven opened the old door and ducked her head as she entered. Kathryn followed slowly, feeling a bit like a foolish teenager back in the Academy. When she entered, she realized that it was a bit dark inside, what with the trees surrounding the house, blocking off the light that otherwise would have come in through the windows, and she could not see Seven. The only sign of her presence was a low, beckoning voice from far across the small, one room home.

"Over here, Kathryn, or have you forgotten?"

So, she had taken her here before, then.

Kathryn did her best to make it seem like she was taking her time rather than trying to navigate her way through the unfamiliar room. She could sense that Seven was watching her closely, yet still so unaware of who she was really observing.

Kathryn's eyes adjusted reluctantly and revealed a reclined Seven, sprawled out on a small bed that Kathryn surmised would just barely fit the two of them. There were clean, white, cotton sheets on the mattress and pretty, dried flowers hung from the white, wrought iron frame that was rusted in almost strategic places. The room was sparse, she noted, filled only by a dresser and about a hundred stacks of what looked like very old books, which gave the room a pleasant, old leather aroma that Janeway fond incredibly appealing.

There wasn't much time for her to survey the room, however, as Seven was very expertly directing her attention elsewhere. Seven had laid her hand on her abdomen, where her dress was pulled up to, revealing a pair of innocent, silk, blue-ish white panties. There were even ruffles around the leg openings.

"Kathryn? Is everything alright?"

She swallowed her heart, which had decided to make a visit to her throat after hitting her stomach, and answered, "I'm fine, Seven. You're just so breath taking." It was the honest truth.

As she looked further at Seven, doing her best to take her time while not seeming to delay climbing onto the bed, she noticed that Seven's chest was clearly visible through her insubstantial, mute-colored dress. The pinkish tink of her nipples did nothing to better camouflage them; They pressed against the loose fabric as if asking to be released.

Kathryn called on all of her strength in order to keep her jaw shut. Seven was waiting for her to come to her. What in the world was she supposed to do? Was it too late to run out, tell the computer to re-active her mirror image, and make a mad dash for the exit? She couldn't lie to herself about why Seven had brought her there. The look in her eyes said it all.

"Are you sure you are not malfunctioning?"

Kathryn bit her tongue and sat on the edge of the bed, letting herself fall back over Seven's legs.

Malfunctioning. Kathryn panicked over that word. Now Seven was really making her worry that her cover would be blown.

"I'm sure, Seven. I am not malfunctioning." She laughed, but kept it curt, not wanting to say anything more. She could not be sure about the sort of action she was supposed to be taking or the way in which Seven expected her to act in "Stage Two", but she was sure that, whatever Seven had expected, she wasn't doing it.

Seven leaned over Kathryn, her legs just next to her head, and brushed the hair back out of Kathryn's face. Janeway thought that, behind the cool Borg exterior, there was a woman with a warm sense of touch. Her fingers in Janeway's hair made Kathryn feel like she was floating.

Closing her eyes, Kathryn did not notice Seven leaning over more, coming in closer to her face. She was too enthralled by the physical connection Seven was offering, a connection that Kathryn would have done anything for but had never expected to occur, and did not even realize that Seven was about to kiss her.

"Seven I--"

Seven pressed her lips to Kathryn's, much more roughly than she had in the meadow. Before Kathryn had time to register the kiss, Seven had topped her, pulled her hands over her head, and was rocking against her, Seven's thigh between Janeway's legs.

Oh dear God, I am going to die, she thought. She was going to die right then and Seven would have to drag her to sick bay and explain why an older woman had been perverse enough to sneak into her holodeck program to have sex with her.

Because this was most certainly sex.

Seven pushed against Janeway's breasts with both hands, which were as unprotected as Seven's. Her leg moved vigorously and firmly against the heat of Janeway's sex, dampening the meager nuisance of her underwear, going straight through the dress.

"Oh..." Kathryn found herself moaning aloud, "Oh,Seven."

Her body had taken over for her and she was just inside, watching--and feeling here and there--as it happened. She dared not keep her eyes open for more than a second at a time and, when Seven decided to slid her one hand down the length of Kathryn's body and begin to lift away her dress, she shut her eyes for what she thought would be forever.

"Kathryn, assist me," Seven requested. Her voice was pliant, the pitch low and wanting. She wanted Kathryn and it hurt beyond comprehension that Seven thought she was saying this to a hologram and not the real thing.

She wanted so badly to reach for her, to grab her and kiss her as passionately as she was being kissed, but all reason told her to just let Seven do what she wanted, to not give her any reason to be suspicious. Seven slipped a finger behind Kathryn's panties just as she was "assisting" her in removing them.

"OH, SEVEN!"

Kathryn's mouth was open wide, her eyes rolling back into her head. Her throat exposed, Seven dove in, lapping at the softened flesh with an eager tongue as she deftly swivelled her hand to allow another finger to enter Janeway's already slick folds.

"Come for me, Kathryn."

Oh, I'm coming, Kathryn found herself thinking. Seven seemed to know every inch of her. Had her hologram really been that accurate?

"Say it, Kathryn."

Seven added a fourth finger and Kathryn moaned her name; this apparently pleased her, whether or not that was what she had wanted her to say.

Kathryn's breasts were fully awakened by the frequent friction Seven provided whenever she thrust more demandingly or came down to nibble Kathryn's exposed throat. Her nipples brushed against Seven's, pulled down into her by gravity, and she gasped when Seven lowered her mouth to them, sucking right through the dress.

"Take it," Kathryn said in a breathy, unfamiliar voice, "take it off."

Seven obliged, dropping to one side of Kathryn and pulling at the thick straps until the dress began to come up and off. Kathryn bounced on the bed, trying to help her along.

When it was off, Kathryn was left with just a pair of underwear on, which was hanging at her ankles. Seven eyed her hungrily, like a predator about to feast upon her prey, and lowered her head again, suckling Kathryn's nipples one at a time as she nuzzled her, her own breasts against Kathryn's belly and her fingers rocking surely in Kathryn's wet, writhing folds.

"Come for me, " she repeated, feeling the tide rising in her lover's sex. She knew when Kathryn was close; she had done it many times this way, holding her like a protector, feeling the erotic heat emanating from her as she neared climax. She loved the moments closest to orgasm, when Kathryn was rolling her hips and calling Seven's name. It was then that she felt truly, absolutely complete. She was wanted, she wanted, she needed and was needed in return, and she was in a state that she could never achieve outside of this bed, outside of the holodeck. As she felt Kathryn's nails digging into her back, Seven knew that it was rising within her as well. Making her Captain feel like that made her aroused beyond her understanding.

"Oh, Seven, don't stop."

Kathryn was moving more slowly against her, but Seven did not ease her pace. She ravaged Kathryn with her fingers, going deeper with each press. He nipples hardened against Kathryn's stomach and she arched, trying to gain more friction against the bed.

Closing her eyes, Seven rode closer to orgasm, unaware that Kathryn was making an effort to touch her, only to be stopped by Seven's pressing into the mattress. Seven opened her eyes sharply to see a gasping Kathryn, bucking against her and begging for access to her sex.

Was this some sort of evolution in her programming? Kathryn had never wanted to touch her before. Seven did not argue, though her mind was still thinking it over, even as Kathryn slid a hasty set of fingers inside Seven's shuddering body.

"Come for me," Kathryn said, echoing Seven's words. She had seen something in Seven's eyes when she had tried to touch her and she worked toward it, not caring what happened now, whether she would be found out. Seven wanted her touch, but she would not ask for it and Kathryn wanted so much to give it.

"Kathryn, I am....I am...I'm...."

They rode each other's hand, vigorously grinding against each other, groping where ever their hands could reach. Seven was engaged by this new action on Janeway's part and came slowly and dramatically, her back arching, her fingers going nearly still and quivering inside of her lover as the tremors of climax shook her.

Kathryn held Seven's soft breast in her hand as she, too, came, her sweet release spreading into Seven's awaiting palm.

I am dying, Kathryn decided. I am already halfway to heaven.

Her hand twitched, squeezing Seven ever so slightly, and the former Borg was just a woman for that one, beautiful, bittersweet moment. As soon as her orgasm had subsided sufficiently, Seven was again a reformed drone. Again, Seven was just laying with an imposter, someone who was not the one she loved. As she laid her head on Kathryn's shuddering chest, Seven began to cry.

"I love you, Seven," Kathryn said in a breath, not yet realizing that Seven was crying. The heat of her tears went unnoticed in combination with the sweat on her chest. But Seven had noticed something. Kathryn had said something completely against her programming.

"What did you just say?"

Kathryn ran her hand through Seven's hair and kissed the top of her head, tears welling in her eyes.

"I said I love you, Seven."

Seven shot up, her eyes entirely transformed. These eyes were not distant and loving. These eyes were afraid.

"That is not part of your programming. Computer, is there a malfunction in character Janeway's programming?"

She appeared wild, as though she'd just become a cornered animal instead of the patient hunter. When the computer answered in the negative, Seven stared down at the woman who was just sitting up and realized with a terrible jolt of horror that Kathryn's hair was straight.

Her hair had been in curls not an hour ago.

"Who..who are you?"

"Seven, don't be afraid."

Kathryn reached out, but Seven jumped from the bed, stepping toward the door.

"That is not a response. Who are you? Computer--"

"SEVEN, NO!"

End Program."

The quant little cottage vanished, replaced by the cold, hard room of the holodeck on Voyager. Out of the corner of her eye, Kathryn could see her Starfleet uniform, cast aside across the room.

"Seven, please, let me explain!"

She didn't even concern herself with her nudity; she went right over to Seven and grabbed hold of her wrists before Seven could get her bearings.

"I meant it, Seven, when I said it!" Seven was looking way, trying to look anywhere but at Kathryn.

"I love you, Seven!"

Seven threw her hands up and detached Janeway from herself. She was completely lost. What had happened? What had just happened? Seven checked her memory and she did not understand what was going on right before her eyes.

"Computer, I said end program!"

"Seven, I'm real! It's me, me, I'm here! I'm Kathryn, I love you!"

Seven backed away again, heading for the exit despite the fact that she was still nude. Kathryn made a desperate grab for Seven, but she slipped away again.

"Computer, delete Kathryn Janeway."

She looked up at her, determined that she was going to see her disappear, that everything was going to be alright, but there she stood, shivering, naked, the residue of their encounter still glistening on the soft curls shielding her sex. Kathryn did not come a step closer.

"I'm not a character, Seven. I'm real." She let her hands fall to her side, her body brutally exposed.

"I'm real. I came to see what it was you were doing because of what Tom said and I discovered you with...with me. I know what I did was wrong, but I'm not sorry I did it!"

Seven covered her body with her hands, tears flooding her face.

There was only one thing she could do.

Seven opened the holodeck doors, exited, and left the real Captain Janeway in Holodeck Two, naked and alone.

Her feet pounded the carpet and Seven could only blindly hope that no one would be out there at that time of night. She turned to the next holodeck and automatically tapped in the sequence that would allow her in.

When she entered, shivering and cold, she realized that there was a program running. She dared not go back out to check who was using Holodeck One, but instead asked the computer to generate her some suitable clothing. She instantly donned a long pair of khaki shorts and a three-quarter length, murky brown shirt. There were boots on her feet, too.

Seven blinked back her tears, focusing outside of herself in order to remain calm. She was in a forest, by the angle of the ground, she was at the foot of a mountain. The clean air was light with the scent of rain that had just fallen and the sound of a nearby water source. Seven did not hurry her way through the pleasant wilderness; she used the gathering of details and hypothesizing to lead her mind away from what had just occurred.

With each step, Seven began to realize that there was most definitely someone nearby. She could smell the smoke of a camp fire, see the glow of it in the distance. Knowing that it was just a program lessened her concern for wild animals, but she was still on edge from a combination of the past few minutes and the darkness playing up on her natural human fear of the night.

As Seven came nearer to the light, she noticed that there was a tent, a rather large one. She always found this human habit of camping to be rather strange, but Chakotay had insisted that it made him feel closer to home again whenever he camped.

If he is here, Seven thought to herself, I am most fortunate. She would not have to discuss her pain if she did not wish to; Chakotay would respect her privacy. Seven sped up, hoping against her doubts that it would indeed be the Commander in that tent or sitting next the fire as he done before with Seven. She actually felt herself missing that uncomfortable moment when Chakotay had put his arm around her shoulders, pulling her into him.

"Commander Chakotay?"

Seven inched past the perimeter of the camp site, nearing what she thought to be the movement of the Commander.

"Commander?"

Seven turned at the fire and noticed someone lying in the grass just far enough from the fire to be out of the range of floating ash.

"Chakotay...Ensign Kim???"

There, entangled on the soft, damp ground, were Harry and Chakotay, their lips pressed lightly and carefully together until Seven's voice startled them.

"SEVEN!"

Harry scrambled away from Chakotay, fear lit in his face by the fire, but Chakotay sat up gently.

"Seven, what are you doing here?"

Chakotay seemed entirely unfazed by Seven's presence. He rested with his one hand against the ground, propping himself up while Harry got to his feet. He watched Seven with a gentle, knowing look.

"Is there something the matter, Seven?"

Seven rubbed her arms nervously, feeling the heat of the fire at her back. She watched Harry curiously. As much as she wanted to feel happy for him, she was too busy fighting to contain the storm of emotions inside of her. She was glad to see that the plan had worked for at least one of them, but she wasn't about to show it.

"Seven, sit down."

She looked at Harry, then at Chakotay, and worried that she was intruding. How terrible she would have felt if someone had walked in when...

"No," Seven said, turning around sharply and running from them before Chakotay had the chance to stop her.

Harry, however, was in hot pursuit.

"Seven, stop!" His voice was harsh behind her, calling after her as she dashed away. She knew she could out run him, she was faster, butB

"OW!"

Seven heard Harry fall and call out in pain as he undoubtedly injured himself. She paused, not turning around, but listening for the faint sound of Harry's voice several meters back.

"Seven, I think I twisted my ankle." He panted, cringing in pain. "Please, Seven, you weren’t't interrupting anything! If it weren’t for you, there would be nothing to interrupt!" He breathed, laying his head against the ground and heard footsteps, but he couldn't tell if they were moving closer or away. "I just wanted to help."

There were strong arms on him now, on both sides. Chakotay had caught up with them.

"I..apologize for the damage, Ensign Kim."

Seven had pulled Harry up by his left arm, Chakotay by his right. He turned to see Seven's sad eyes watching him with concern.

"I did not intend to invade your privacy," Seven said, unbearably aware of the pain that could cause. Harry just shook his head.

"I know what you did for me, Seven. I checked the program before I left and..." Harry hobbled with the two of them bracing him up, turning back toward the site, "I wanted to thank you."

Chakotay didn't seem to gather a conclusion about what Harry was saying, but he knew enough that it had to be something good, so he did not question it as he and Seven carried him back and set him on one the logs in front of the fire.

Harry nursed his leg, wincing at the pain. They could remedy it quickly in sick bay, but Harry refused.

"I don't want to end our night like this," he said sadly. Chakotay smiled at him, assuring him that it was not as if they didn't have an entire week to look forward to later. Harry grinned, his teeth flashing and his eyes sparkling. All he could think about was how he longed for that week, that he was sure it was going to be the time of his life.

Chakotay turned away from Harry, a spattering of pink color on his face in spite of his composure. It was strange, realizing his affections for Harry. It made him understand, in retrospect, why he had been so cautious with Seven and the Captain, why he had not been his normally brazen self and taken the next step with them.

As he felt the reluctance in him to leave Harry, he knew there was something important there.

"Alright, Seven," Chakotay said, sitting her down next to the tent, "do you want to talk about it?"

Seven had not intended to, but she found herself wanting to tell him. She knew that she could trust him but...

"I do not really know what it is," she admitted. The reality of the situation had not yet settled in for her.

Over the course of a month, Seven had increasingly spent more and more time in the holodecks at the suggestion of B'Elanna Torres. What Seven had not known was that B'Elanna knew what she was doing in there; Tom had accidently stumbled upon a strange program and B'Elanna knew it at once to be Seven's and told Tom to leave it alone. B'Elanna had not known exactly who Seven was romantically and intimately engaging with in there, but she had put two and two together quickly early that evening. Seven had gone from tame walks, to candle-lit dinners, ending in an affair that she found only partially satisfying. For the first time, that night, she had felt like she was complete, that the Borg in her and the human had resolved their differences in order to allow her heart some room.

Now, she was sitting next to Chakotay, his soon to be lover sitting just out of hearing range, and Seven had no idea where to begin.

"This is about Kathryn, isn't it."

Seven looked up into his eyes, thrown back into the awareness of her own existence. He was looking at her like one would look at a wounded child; a sadness deep in his eyes, as though he assumed she would break at any moment and he would be unable to do anything to mend her.

"I was running a program," Seven said, her voice shaking, "And when I ended it, she was still there."

As brief an explanation as it was, he understood immediately. He, too, had one been guilty of the same thing, but he had never been discovered by the object of his affection. It was hard to imagine the mixture of pain, embarrassment, and confusion that Seven must have been feeling.

"Where is she?" he asked calmly. Seven did not answer, but simply shook her head as if she were disgusted with herself.

"Seven, what you did wasn't wrong," Chakotay assured her, reaching out and grasping her shoulder, forcing her to look up at him. "What you did was out of desperation, because you wanted her to love you. There are so many of us who have done the same thing. You can't beat yourself up over it."

"But she replaced the hologram with herself! She...she...she let me..."

Seven looked down, the tears dripping steadily from her eyes and dripping onto the ground. She searched the earth with her eyes, wanting so badly to find a ditch to disappear into.

"Seven?"

Chakotay lifted her chin and examined her fearful eyes, knowing deep empathy for her situation.

"Did she let you make love to her, like you had the hologram?"

Seven bit her bottom lip and nodded.

"Don't you think that should tell you something?"

Seven looked away, Chakotay's firm but undemanding hand still on her face. What should Seven have gotten from Kathryn's actions? She felt betrayed, that her private thoughts were no longer her own. She felt like her Captain had violated her in some way, as though Kathryn touching her as the hologram would not have was somehow wrong.

But she had enjoyed it.

She had wanted it.

Seven looked back at Chakotay and blinked rapidly, her sight significantly impaired by the liquid in her eyes. He was smiling meekly.

"Did she say she loves you?"

Seven looked away again, this time brushing the Commander's hand away. Of course she had said it, that was what had alerted Seven that something was wrong. She had said it at least five times, pleading with Seven to stay. But had she just said it to keep Seven there? Was the Captain doing just what Seven had feared, giving in so that Seven could have happiness? No, she would not allow it. She would not have herself loved in pity!

Chakotay was watching the play of emotions going on behind Seven's tear-filled eyes, wondering what Seven must have been making of the situation. Then his mind invariably went to Kathryn: What was she thinking? Was she still sitting there in the other holodeck, waiting for Seven to return? Or was she already in her quarters, preparing to endure the rest of the journey home avoiding Seven at all costs?

He just couldn't let them do that. He wouldn’t step aside now that he had found love and let the two women he cared for most give up on each other.

There was a beep from the computer, a sound that had gone unnoticed by Harry and Chakotay when they had been otherwise occupied. It announced that someone else had entered the program.

"She is coming," Seven said, panic in her voice. She tried to get up, ready to run, but Chakotay laid a firm hand on her shoulder.

"Wait, Seven," he asked. "You don't have to run...and you don't have to do it alone."

Seven wiped away some of her tears and noticed that Harry was watching the woods.

"Do you hear something?"

His face did not change or look toward Seven. He simply shook his head and squinted, looking into the darkness for the form he expected to see.

"We can leave you two alone, if you want, but we'll be nearby if you need us."

Seven was startled that he was planning on leaving. He quickly gather up Harry just as footsteps grew nearer and Seven, too shocked to do anything, stayed where she was, legs sprawled out, sitting erect against the tent flap.

"Seven, please don't run."

Kathryn's voice preceded her as she timidly emerged from the ring of trees surrounding the camp site. She was clothed almost identically to Seven, the climbing boots awkward for her to walk in and the blouse loose on her smaller frame. He hair was still out and there were tiny bits of leaves snagged in her locks.

"Let me explain," she said, coming no closer. "Let me tell you why I did it, Seven. Then, if you still don't want to have anything to do with me, I will understand."

Seven did not look up at her. She just allowed her silence as permission for her to continue.

"I've never been good...with women," Kathryn began, pacing the opposite side of the fire. "I've always thought I should be with men, so I ran away from the women in my life." She sighed, stopping to look at Seven, across and through the fire. He face was stained with tears and her eyes were half shut. She wondered what pain she had caused Seven by what she had done, if she could ever redeem herself...if she would ever be allowed to redeem herself.

"I've had a few relationships with women," she continued, "but I always convinced myself that it just wasn't me, that I wasn't a lesbian. I wanted to be with a man and...it only made the pain worse."

She thought of her father, her fiancé...she thought of Mark and his marriage...she wanted to cry.

"I always thought that, maybe, I was just meant to be alone, that no one could ever love me when I didn't know what I wanted!" She chocked behind a sob and Seven was alarmed by the sadness in her voice, the tears interfering with her words. She fought the urge to look up.

"I mean, look what I've done to Chakotay! I could never have loved him, so he moved on and...and..."

Kathryn sat down on a log, her back to the fire and Seven, her voice soft and rife with the pain of her failed relationships and the incomprehensible pain that losing Seven would cause.

"And I was not able to love him because I was in love with someone else," she managed, her voice barely above a whisper. But Seven had heard her.

"I was in love with you, Seven," she said, looking over her shoulder. "And I still am..." She sighed, tossing up her hands, and lowered them into her lap. She trembled uncontrollably, unable to fight the emotions she had stirred up. With a burst of tears, Kathryn leaned over into her lap, pressing her hands to her face, and sobbed, deep, wrenching sobs that shook her body and her soul.

"Uh...uh..."

Seven heard Kathryn, gasping for air between teary convulsions, and her eyes moved deliberately against her, finding Kathryn and resting there, watching her back heave and shake.

"I love you, Seven," she whispered between attempts to control her tears. Seven took in the sight of Captain Kathryn Janeway, sobbing irrepressibly, and what had happened in the holodeck rushed back to her, the sensation of being touched, the scent of Kathryn on her fingers, the taste of her in her mouth as she ran her tongue over the taught skin of her neck. She shook as she remembered Kathryn touching her, spreading her swollen lips with aching tenderness, stroking her silken organ until Seven had struggled for breath, shuddering into a pinnacle of release that had left Seven bewildered and amazed. This was the same woman who had touched the deepest parts of her, emotionally as well as physically? This was she, quivering in sadness and profound loss, crying as though Seven was already gone?

Seven realized what she had done and it hurt. It hurt more than knowing Kathryn had invaded her privacy or that she had allowed Seven to unknowingly touch her, make love to her. Seven was ashamed. She had run from the very thing she desired most! Kathryn Janeway had supplicated herself like an offering before her, and Seven had run, thinking that she was being deceived, that it could not be true.

Seven finally saw Kathryn Janeway for what she was: a Captain and a woman, reconciled within her to give her heart some room. Seven had missed herself, reflected in the Captain. She was looking through her, staring right at her soul's mate.

"I, too, could not love Chakotay because my heart belonged to another."

Kathryn thought she heard someone speak, but she wasn't sure. Maybe, just maybe, Seven was speaking to her? Even if it was just to tell her than she never wanted to see her again, at least she would get to hear it from her. At least she would get to hear Seven speak to her one more time.

"I was in love with another," Seven said," and I would not approach the person because I was concerned that she would sacrifice her own happiness for my own."

Seven looked down at her hands and sucked on her bottom lip, trying not to think to much, trying to "speak from her heart" as the Doctor had advised her. How ironic, she thought, that the man who had once confessed to loving her would be the one to give her the way to accept the love of another.

"I did not want you to give up your happiness, Kathryn" Seven said, finally looking right at her. "I would have gone on loving you in secret, living a lie with a hologram, to ensure that you would be happy by your own choice, with whomever you truly loved. Not just who you wanted to love... "

"I didn't force myself to love you, Seven." Kathryn turned, her eyes piercingly blue through the fire and tears. She was a painfully beautiful sight, the anger, fear, and love in her eyes paired with the tangle of her hair, the lines on her face. Seven was entirely captivated, even though she thought she would never again allow herself the touch of Kathryn's gentle hands, holographic or otherwise.

"I've loved you from the moment you arrived on Voyager, Seven." Kathryn intertwined her fingers and leaned forward, looking into the fire. "You were an enigma, a puzzle that there was no answer to." She laughed, her teeth glinting in the fire light. "I couldn't figure you out! I couldn't study you, because you were unpredictable. I couldn't make you fit my ideas of you because you were your own person. I love you because you are unique, Seven. I love you because I can. Not because of some...feeling of obligation," she ended, her head hung over her hands. Seven watched her and knew that a hologram could never compete with the real thing. Kathryn Janeway was so much more...damaged. And that was what was so endearing about her to Seven. Seven did not want perfection anymore. She wanted something real.

"I apologize for running from you, Kathryn."

She looked up and smiled, a brave but weak smile.

"I'm sorry for lying to you."

The two of them stared at each other through the fire. It seemed like a fair trade, their apologies. Seven felt the weight of fear leaving her more completely the longer she watched the fire dance in Kathryn's eyes.

"I just want to know one thing," Kathryn said. Seven nodded, apprehensive but determined to be honest, no matter what she asked.

"Did Harry and Chakotay...get together?"

Seven had not expected that. How could she answer? She didn't know if Chakotay even wanted anyone to know. And she suddenly felt indebted to him for keeping her from fleeing, more so to Harry for coming after her.

"I do not know."

"I'd prefer it if you were honest with me."

"Why do you assume I'm being dishonest?"

"Because you are lying."

Kathryn indicated the two shirts on the ground next to the fire. They most certainly were not Seven's.

"I am uncertain as to whether or not the Commander and Ensign Kim wish to reveal their relationship just yet."

Kathryn nodded.

"I think that hiding things just makes things harder," she said, saying more than she had meant to. Seven stared at her for a moment longer, then reached back and unzipped the tent.

"What are you doing?"

Seven turned and said, simply, "I wish for you to join me."

She disappeared into the tent.

"Seven, I hardly think this is the time for you to be examining Chakotay's tent..."

But there was no answer. Seven had left the tent flap partially unzipped and was apparently waiting for Kathryn to get up the nerve to join her.

Cautiously, Janeway left her seat and made her way over to the tent. She could not see inside; the light of the fire did not penetrate its outer shell. With a deep breathe, Kathryn tugged at the zipper and climbed in, turning to close it back up once inside.

"Seven?"

She felt like she had in the cottage, trying not to fall as she sat down on a sleeping bag. The tent was actually rather roomy inside, despite the low ceiling. Seven was sitting on top of the other sleeping bag.

"Seven, why are you in here?"

"In the cottage," Seven said, crawling over to Kathryn, "we did not properly initiate this relationship."

Kathryn gasped as Seven kissed her, the tears still lingering on her face making the skin of her cheek slick when Seven rubbed her face against Kathryn's.

"Seven, I don't think that we have to--"

"Chakotay said that you allowed me to make love to you as I would have the hologram." She grabbed Kathryn's hands and pulled her into a laying position.

"He was wrong."

She straddled her and Kathryn realized that there was moonlight pouring in from the roof of the tent, which was just a sheet of thick plastic. Seven's face was shadowed where the light did not fall. She looked positively beautiful, but Kathryn did not realize how lovely she looked to Seven, her face awash in the moon's glow, her eyes sparkling like tiny blue diamonds in the silver-white sea of her skin.

"I never made love to the hologram, Kathryn," Seven promised, as much relieved to hear herself say it and believe it as she was to see Kathryn's tears well up with surprised tears.

"I wished to make love only to you...but I could not bring myself to love the hologram...when I knew that she was not you..."

Seven lowered herself onto Kathryn, nuzzling into her neck, just below her ear.

"I wish to make love you, now, Kathryn. If you would allow me to. "

Her voice was plaintive but not pleading. She rested her hand over Kathryn's chest, her fingers lingering on a button as she gave Kathryn time to think. She had to be certain that what happened in the cottage wasn't just chance. She had to know that Kathryn wanted to love her, to be loved by her. In every way.

Kathryn brought up her hand and laid it over Seven's. Seven did not move, thinking that Kathryn had made her decision, that she did not want her to continue. But then she lifted Seven's hand away and unhooked the button.

Seven did not move, but rested her head against Kathryn's chest, feeling the nervous breath moving in her love's chest. She gently unbuttoned the next two, taking her time. She wanted Kathryn to say it.

She had reached the last button when Kathryn's hand fell on her's again.

"I want you to, Seven," she whispered, urging Seven's hand beneath the thick fabric. Seven inched further up her shirt and cupped her hands around Kathryn's bare breast, absorbing the heat of her body.

Seven looked up at Kathryn as she rolled back up, sitting atop her.

"I love you, Seven."

She smiled as she pushed the fabric aside, sighing as though she were seeing her for the first time.

"I love you," she said, leaning down and kissing Kathryn's rib cage through her skin. She felt everything needed to go slower than before, that she needed to show Kathryn what she had longed to do but had never been able to manage with a mere shadow.

Kathryn found herself running her fingers through Seven's hair, pulling out the ponytail and tugging with slight urgence as Seven ran her kisses along the underside of Kathryn's breasts. She wanted so much for Seven to envelope them with her warm mouth that she had to struggle not to yank Seven's head back.

With patience and growing desire, Seven caressed with her fingers and brushed with her lips, trailing Kathryn's illuminated skin as though she were trying to memorize it, mapping out every inch with her roaming hands as she sucked the tip of Kathryn's nipples with just the softest part of her lips.

Her lover moaning beneath her, Seven felt an arousal like she had never before experienced. Hearing this Kathryn, her Kathryn, sighing with contentment as Seven stroked her stomach or gasping when Seven nipped the flesh of her breast made Seven's sex awaken, throbbing beneath her khaki shorts.

As she removed Kathryn's long shorts, the heat only increased, her need more overwhelming. Seven removed Kathryn's underwear with painstaking, caring motions, slowly easing them off of Janeway while fighting the urge to ravage her as she wished to.

Unconsciously, Seven slid a hand down past her own waist line, sliding her fingers against the fabric of her panties, rubbing gently as to not alert Kathryn to her desperate need and painful arousal. Her nipples pressed hard against her tight blouse, her breathe growing more ragged with every plea that rose from her whimpering lover's throat.

"Let me touch you, Seven," Kathryn begged, the effects of watching Seven service herself becoming too much for her. "I want to, please Seven, I want to." She had never in her life heard her voice more piteous, felt her need more keenly. She wanted to tear open Seven's shirt, roll her onto the ground and have her way with her, stroke her open, pulsating mouth with her tongue, probe her nether regions until she had lapped every droplet of sweet nectar from her sex.

"Seven, please, please..."

Kathryn whimpered against her as Seven offered her right breast, which Kathryn took hungrily into her mouth. She felt herself moaning against Seven's skin, her hands wandering down in search of Seven's own. She arched as Seven probed her wetness, seeking entry that she was more than willing to give.

"Oh, Seven," she whispered into her hair as Seven lowered her head, leaving wet kisses along Kathryn's stomach. "Seven...Seven...Seven..."

Kathryn groped for her hands, but Seven had already lowered herself down so that her face was pressed against Kathryn's entrance. Seven continued to crook her fingers inside of her, but Kathryn could not feel it. She was apprehensively waiting for the sudden feeling of Seven's tongue on her throbbing clitoris.

As soon as the thick flesh of Seven's tongue pushed against Kathryn's wet opening, brushing her clit unexpectedly, she shuddered violently. She wanted to pull Seven up to her, caress her wet folds with her tongue, give Seven the pleasure that Seven was set on giving her instead.

"Seven, please, I need to...I want..."

But Seven only thought that Kathryn was pushing her on, wanting her to make her come. Kathryn finally grasped Seven's hair in her hand and pulled her up from between her legs, forcing her into a deep, passionate kiss.

"I want to please you," she said when they broke from each other. "I don't want you just to touch me, like with the hologram."

Seven was surprised, but complied. She did not know what Kathryn wanted her to do, but she thought removing her clothes would be right. It just felt good to slowly peal away her shirt, her pants. She liked that Kathryn watched her, hungry for more of her skin. Seven went to remove her underwear, but Kathryn stopped her.

"No, let me," she said, laying her hand over Seven's mound. Seven unintentionally pushed against the offered palm, the friction making her blind with desire. Kathryn slowly moved Seven forward, inch by inch, until her sex was almost at Kathryn's mouth.

"Turn around," she commanded, meaning it as more of a request, but Seven immediately complied as if it were a demand. She turned, her back to Kathryn, and waited for whatever it was Kathryn was planning to come into effect.

"Back up," she said, pulling at Seven's hips. The rubbing of Kathryn's breasts against her heated sex was almost too much for her and when Kathryn pushed down on her back, forcing her face down to Kathryn's glistening sex, Seven though she would simply die of pleasure.

Being shorter than Seven, Kathryn tried to lift her hips for Seven. She slowly stroked Seven with two fingers until she felt a hungry, unsure mouth tighten on her nether-lips.

Kathryn gently set her tongue against Seven's heated flesh, letting the hot liquid lay on her tongue as she moved her tongue up and down, slowly but firmly. She could feel Seven falter in her own attempts whenever Kathryn moved too close to her clitoris, too deeply into her opening.

Slowly, steadily, they fell into a rhythm. Seven had turned her head, curling in on herself in order to reach Kathryn, and was steadily gaining confidence, her fingers following her tongue into Kathryn. The heat in her was growing, she could feel it. The harder Seven tried to concentrate, the more she tried to not feel the wonderful tingling throughout her body, the more she ached with the sensations.

Kathryn opened her mouth completely and gently lapped at Seven from top to bottom, pausing longer at her protruding nub with each pass. Seven was quivering and grabbing for Kathryn's thighs after only a few strokes.

Sweat making their bodies slick, Seven and Kathryn began to mold together, their hips sliding against each other's shoulders, their thighs closing in on each other's ears. Kathryn finally could no longer fight her desire to hear Seven come, to feel her body tremble in orgasm, Kathryn closed her mouth around Seven's swollen clitoris and sucked, flicking her tongue over the tip until she could hear Seven's breath quicken, catch, and then stop.

"KATHRYN! "

She clutched at her Captain's thighs, not wanting to lose control, but she was too late. Her body went rigid, white light flashing in her mind. And for a long moment, she couldn't see, feel, or say anything. She was frozen in the white light.

"Se...Seven?"

Kathryn trembled, the lack of Seven's touch like something foreign to her. She gently rubbed Seven's back, massaging her until she collapsed onto her, Seven's cheek settled on her knee. For a moment, she didn't feel anything, just Seven's breathe on her leg. But then Seven was shifting, there was movement between her legs.

"No, Seven," she said, pressing on Seven's back, but she continued, trying to ignore her, but Kathryn was persistent. She didn't want Seven to feel obligated and she didn't think she could handle it anyway!

Eventually, she had to shift , pushing Seven abruptly.

"You don't have to, Seven."

Seven turned toward her, her face full of apprehension and confusion.

"But I thought--"

"You thought wrong," Kathryn said, pulling Seven toward her. Seven allowed the movement and Kathryn gathered her in her arms, Seven's head resting on Kathryn's stomach.

Kathryn ran her fingers through Seven's hair, feeling her breath flowing out steadily onto Kathryn's over heated skin. It felt like ice.

And, as she leaned back, resting her head on the sleeping bag that had been hastily pushed into a corner, she realized that it was a wonderful feeling.

"I love you, Seven," she whispered, not caring if Seven heard her or not, because she knew she would be given the chance to say it again many times. She let herself smile, the moon light falling in her eyes and the stars blinking far above her. For a moment, she felt as though she were home again.

Looking down at Seven, she realized that she was.

"Captain?"

There was some one at the door of the tent. Kathryn, alerted, sat up. She rose an eyebrow at Seven, who peered at her from behind dozing eyes.

"Who is it?"

"It...it's Harry Kim, Captain."

Seven looked at Kathryn and crawled to the door flap.

"Computer, generate duplicate tent thirty meters from present location."

There was a surge of holographic light and Seven looked out of the window screen to see the tent across the way. Chakotay went toward it and Seven turned back, a sheepish grin on her face.

"What was that about?"

Kathryn laughed as Seven came back over to her, her eyes twinkling with her laughter.

"Was that really Harry?"

Seven nodded.

"My goodness..."

"He and Commander Chakotay are in a relationship similar to ours now, I believe, as a result of the game as well."

Kathryn found herself blushing at the thought of Chakotay and Harry doing anything near what Seven and she had done, but she didn't think on it long. Something had struck her, plain as day.

"That game...it was all on purpose, wasn't it?"

Seven looked down at the floor, her face lit by the moon so beautifully that Kathryn found her complaints at the details dying.

"I'm glad," she said, leaning back against the now rolled-up sleeping bag. Seven grinned against Kathryn's skin as she shifted upward, resting her head beneath Kathryn's chin.

"I am glad as well."

Kathryn smiled in the light, hearing the content sigh of her senior officer as he undoubtedly allowed Harry to nestle in the crook of his arm as she had allowed Seven to.

For a minute, Kathryn wondered what she was doing there. What was she doing, a captain aboard a star ship, lying with a woman nearly ten years her junior? Could it possibly work?

Seven sighed, her breath coating Kathryn's collar bone, and it made her smile.

It would work, she thought. It had to, because she wasn't about to live without it.

"I love you, too, Kathryn."

She smiled. Ah, she thought, that's what I'm doing here, in bed with an ex-Borg.

Being in love.

The end